


When?

by findingsoojin



Category: (여자)아이들 | (G)I-DLE
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Musicians, Pianist Minnie, Slow Burn, Violinist Miyeon, i havent watched the anime this was based off of lol, so slow burn it hurts, very angsty overall im sorry but enjoy the pain
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-14
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:13:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 21,435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25269658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/findingsoojin/pseuds/findingsoojin
Summary: I believe that love is transcendent-there is no one love. For, if one leaves, another may come to you."When?" You may ask.You'll know.It is in our hands if we accept that new love or, in our grief, let it go.–Minnie struggles to recover from the love that she lost. On the road to moving on and reviving her childhood passion, a girl with a violin comes into her life, the least she expected to help her on her journey. It is in Minnie's hands if she accepts the strings that fate laid out for her, or drown in her grief and stay living in the memories of her past.
Relationships: Cho Miyeon/Minnie Nicha Yontararak, Jeon Soyeon/Song Yuqi
Comments: 14
Kudos: 52





	1. 1 - Nice Weather

**Author's Note:**

> hello!  
> i've decided to publish this chapter to see if people are interested in this story.
> 
> i got this from a prompt but i twisted it up a bit so it wouldn't be too similar from where it was based off of by the prompter, who is a friend of mine and who i'm dedicating this story to!
> 
> anyways i hope you like it and i'll put the next one up real soon! also tell me what you think, i would love to hear what you have to say. have a great day!
> 
> -c

It feels like the end of the world.

Though the weather seems to be okay.

Everything seemed to have lost every bit of life in them. The sun was out but large clouds kept on covering it up, only allowing a few rays to drop down the lowly earth below. Wind blew, but it howls as if it mourns, sometimes too loud to ignore, at other instances, too silent to let go. Trees rustled and their branches danced to the deep howls, like a ritual, goosebumps can be sent to anyone who feels the lifeless energy the place had now acquired.

The whirring of an old desk fan is the only thing that resonated throughout the sickly room. Beige curtains waved along with the soft wind that flowed through the window grills.

Among the breeze comes a butterfly, flying inside the pale green bedroom. It hovers, over dead potted plants, dirty clothes, and half empty bottles. It looks like the place has been abandoned.

Butterflies can smell-it is their most important sense. But even with the smell of alcohol wafting through the air, the little insect pushed through and flew towards the only other living thing in the room.

On her bed, Minnie laid on her back with her eyes fixed on the ceiling. Dried tears stained her cheeks and temples, scattering her eye make-up all over her face. She wasn't crying. But, yes, she had just stopped crying, maybe a few hours ago, she doesn't really keep track of time anymore. It was starting to form into a vile routine now, but Minnie couldn't stop it from turning into one.

Days seemed to loop, as if they had their own minds, they either pass by too quickly or too slowly. Minnie doesn't know what she should wish for.

While counting the dark patches that had formed on her once white ceiling, she spots a shiny blue in her blurred vision, the butterfly lands on the tip of her nose. Minnie stared at it cross-eyed. It opened its sapphire wings, showing off the cells captured with beautiful blue gradients and shimmer from the light. It closed and opened them very slowly before taking off and leaving through the bedroom door. Minnie's eyes didn't fail to follow it, soon after, she finds her whole body following as well.

Mindlessly walking through the corridors of her apartment, Minnie doesn't know what came over her. Her limbs feel like they're about to fall off. All she knows is that the blue thing is pretty and she is a pretty curious girl. It has been a while since something different happened during her lonely days.

The butterfly falters then floats again, passing by beams of sunlight, the shimmer on its wings grow with huge bokeh as the light hits. As sluggish and disoriented Minnie feels, she still finds it very pretty.

They were now in the living room. It looked exactly like the bedroom. Bottles, dead plants, empty packets of food lying all over the place. Minnie barely bats an eye at the mess. She continued to follow the blue butterfly across the room.

There was only one thing that separates itself from the dump that has grown in Minnie's living room. A piano. Not grand, not fancy, not anything. Just a piano she found one day for a low price that seemed like a good deal and an open chance to finally reignite her childhood passion.

She told herself she'll make it pretty on her own, she didn't fail to do so.

She painted it white, to cover the stains on the old wood, _"It will make our living room bright and full of life!"_ She exclaimed the day she poured acrylic all over the instrument. She tuned the strings, a little help from the internet was all she needed and the old thing was good to go, _"Now that the melodies are fixed, it matches your voice."_ She smiled after closing the lid and hitting a key while looking at her one and only. She carved their names, kind of like a tattoo, to personalize it and make it special for only them, _"When our kids and grandkids see this, they will say, 'Wow, they loved each other so much!'"_ Making a face while listening to the most harmonious chuckle she has ever heard. And finally, a picture in a frame, so she could see the smile of her love every day.

She stared as the butterfly flew towards the picture, framed on top of the piano. It sat on top of the plastic frame, opening and closing its wings slowly, as if it was looking at Minnie and waiting for her to do something.

Minnie can't look at the picture though, she just can't. Her eyes automatically blur and she began to look frantically at anything but the picture. She feels dizzy, her stomach feels like it's going to splurge at any second, her legs feel numb and tingly, her eyes are starting to form tears. The only thing she could hear is the thumping of her heart. It's sick and slow, making her feel more useless than she already thought she was.

She began to think to calm herself down. What is she doing? Well, she seems to be having a panic attack right now. She has to ask herself, _why?_

 _Why?_ She doesn't know why. It's because of that stupid butterfly. If she hadn't followed it out, she would have been fine. _Is it really the butterfly's fault?_ No, it was hers. She was the one that wanted a change in her lonely day-to-day life. _Why did she want to change her day-to-day life if she was already living fine enough?_ Living fine enough is such bullshit, the house is in shambles and she hasn't eaten anything in two days. _Why hasn't she eaten?_ Minnie wants to die. _Why?_ She just does. _Doesn't she want to live in this world anymore?_ What is the point of living in the world when all she could do right now was to wait for herself to die? Smoking? Drinking? She's done it all, she could say. She just wants to die. _But-_

_Silence._

Minnie opened her eyes she didn't even know were closed. They were sealed shut and it felt like she was going to rip her eyelids apart. Her hands were in fists and her nails dug into her palm, leaving her knuckles white and cold.

She didn't think the day would come that looking at their picture on top of of the piano would make her want to gauge her eyes out. She didn't think a picture of them smiling would bring her so much pain. Pain and confusion. Confusion and suffering. It was getting to much to handle.

The butterfly kept flapping its wings, slowly, terribly slow.

It was mocking Minnie, it was telling her she made a mistake. Minnie's heart started to pump blood faster.

It was telling her she is the cause of her own pain, Minnie's hands rolled into fists.

It was telling her she was a murderer, Minnie's breathing picked up.

_You can never bring her back._

Minnie couldn't take it anymore.

She tore her eyes away from the mocking blue blur and frantically searched for anything, just anything she could grab. Her eyes land on a broken pot on top of the coffee table. Without any thought at all, she grabbed it from the edge, not even wincing as the sharp clay pierced through the skin of her palm, and hurled it towards the piano. She screamed, louder than she has ever felt she did.

"WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT FROM ME!?"

The pot hits the center panel that covered the piano's strings, it shattered on contact, leaving a crack on the darkened dent of the wood. Handfuls of dry rocks and soil spilled from the shattered pot and dirtied the white keys. The impact from the pot made the picture frame fall on its back, the butterfly flying away from the scene. This time, Minnie's eyes were fixed on the damage she's done. Her shoulders moving up and down as she tried her best to catch her breath. Her rage was getting to her head, her face felt hot, her hand stung, her blood dripped on the floor. Sunlight still hit her eyes from the reflection of the bottles lying on the floor. What nice weather they're having today, right?

She hears a banging from outside of the house. Their gate was now being hit very loudly and the sound of the clanging metal made Minnie's ears ring.

The sound was piercing through her skull, she could only close her eyes from suddenly feeling lightheaded. It didn't stop, the banging, in fact it was now accompanied by a loud voice calling her name. Minnie couldn't process her thoughts as she brought her hand to her temple in response to ease the pain. She surprised herself from seeing the blood that covered her fingers. It glistened under the light, though there was pain, Minnie couldn't care less, she just wanted the banging to stop.

She pulled her own weight and made her way towards the locked front door, clicking the lock and swinging it open very slowly. It made a very loud creaking sound that caused her to wince once more, but as she did, the banging on the gate stopped.

She stepped outside for the first time in three weeks. Sunlight hit her toes, her bare feet touching sun-scorched cement, it was nothing to her at this point. Everything being hit by the sunlight made it hard for her to see who was making all the clamor at eleven in the morning. Her eyes blurred, the light was too bright and so she had to squint before she felt like she was going to go blind.

The figure outside their gate waved their hand above the metal door.

"Minnie unnie! Is that you?" A loud voice echoed.

Familiarity brought Minnie's nerves to an ease. It was her friend, Yuqi. She hasn't seen Yuqi since she left three weeks ago.

A few seconds later, another voice chimed in, "Minnie unnie, open up! We brought some food."

It was her other friend, Soyeon. Minnie could hear the plastic bags rustle from behind the gate.

She was hesitant to move but they were her friends after all. She should at least be human around the people who still care about her. Without saying a word, she walks towards the gate, hesitantly reaching her good hand out to open turn the latch. They came all the way here for her, she can't just leave them outside.

The door opens to Yuqi holding way too many plastic bags and Soyeon holding a Motorbike helmet.

Yuqi's smile drops along with the bags of food as soon as she sees blood on Minnie's temple. She moves forward and takes Minnie's head into her hands, examining the _wound_.

"What happened?" Yuqi gasped.

"How did you get this? Are you okay? Are you hurt?" Yuqi frantically searches for more wounds on Minnie's body. Carefully examining the girl's head and neck before she made her way to the girl's arms. She finds the source of the blood. She gently grabs Minnie's wrist and twists it enough for her to see the girl's palm. It was red to the core and the slice looked like it dug deep into the skin. She looked up at the girl and Minnie didn't even wince.

"Unnie, what happened to your hand?" Soyeon asks after grabbing the bags that Yuqi dropped on the floor. They were both waiting for her to answer, but Minnie just stared. Yuqi's worry lines accentuate.

"We've been waiting outside for a while. Your doorbell seems to be broken and we guessed you couldn't hear me shouting." Yuqi's voice came out hoarser than it usually was. She cleared her throat, "We couldn't just leave, I was beginning to worry about you." Her eyes say more than her words. Minnie sees pity.

"We heard a loud noise from the inside too. A scream followed that and we just knew we needed to get inside to see you, we were so worried. Are you okay?" Yuqi tried to get anything out of the girl, but it looked like they were just talking to a bloody statue.

Yuqi turned to Soyeon after Minnie's lack of response, Soyeon looked just as worried as her and sighed.

Minnie looked like she was falling apart.

Correction, Minnie looked like something you put together with shitty convenience store superglue after falling and shattering to pieces.

Soyeon felt like an awful friend. Yuqi has been visiting Minnie every week. Soyeon knows this because Soyeon drives her there in the morning and picks her up at night. Yuqi's hugs felt heavier every time she visits. It was like Soyeon could see the girl's battery percentage at its peak when she leaves her in the morning and see it drop every time she walks out of the house at night.

After those days, Yuqi always comes home crying. Their nights were always spent with ice cream, funny tv shows, and Yuqi talking about Minnie like she was a hopeless case. It hurt Soyeon's heart to hear the words "she's not Minnie anymore" coming from Yuqi herself.

She feels mostly responsible for what happened with Minnie now. She was the one that told Yuqi to give Minnie some time to herself.

She cares, she really does. But it pains to see your once bubbly, ray-of-sunshine, nothing-could-go-wrong-friend turn into the most quiet and reserved person you know. She doesn't know how Yuqi could keep doing what she does. They're best friends after all, but Soyeon is her friend too. Though she sees Minnie every now and then, the girl hasn't spoken a word to her in months.

It took her a lot of convincing to get herself to where they are now. And now that she's seen the situation, she can't help but regret the times she wasn't there for Minnie. She absolutely has to make up for it and she is not going to miss the chance right now.

"Let's go inside, I'll treat your hand." Soyeon said and it seemed to her that Minnie agreed after giving her a small nod.

"Unnie, you're wearing the same thing I left you with. Let's get you all cleaned up, you have dirt all over your shirt." Yuqi hugged Minnie from her side and guided her towards the front door. Soyeon made sure to close the gate before following the two. Minnie looks back at her while Yuqi tried to open the front door but she turned her head away as soon as she locked eyes with Soyeon. It was too quick for Soyeon to do or say anything, she's getting more worried, this has been the worst.

Before stepping into the house, Soyeon glanced up as the sun hid behind darker clouds that stretched for miles. Guess the weather wasn't going to be so nice after all.


	2. 2 - Cream Pasta

Minnie sits on the sofa with her eyes on her palm, her blood, beaming red, pierced through the white cloth that was wrapped around it by her friend. She gently moved her fingers for any sensation of pain but none of which surfaced. Her nails had grown long and out of shape, particles of dirt still wedged underneath.

Her two friends have left her on the sofa after much assurance that she was going to be fine while they clean the entire house. Soyeon had wrapped her hand and retreated to find a vacuum cleaner with Yuqi following shortly in her steps.

Minnie stayed there motionless, she hears the clinking of empty bottles and the crushing of cheap plastic as her friends moved around her. She pans her head, her vision became blurry with every twitch her eye makes and the surroundings look like she's underwater. Voices go from clear to muffled over and over and she feels like she's floating in the middle of the ocean, she wishes she was. She's been alone for so long, she wonders if something were to happen to her, how long would it take her friends to find her?

The sound of a vacuum picks at her ears and she turns her head towards the hallway. Yuqi fiddles with the snout of the hose of their old vacuum cleaner which has been stored somewhere in the house, she doesn't remember where.

"Soyeon-ah, I got it working, where do I start?" Yuqi calls for the short-haired girl, who busied herself in the kitchen.

Soyeon hums, "I think you should start with the living room."

Yuqi turns her head to see Minnie looking at her, she smiles as she tried to drag the vacuum and the cord across the still plastic-riddled floor. What a maze the house has turned into.

Minnie feels bad. She feels like a toddler, not allowed to do anything and being left with two other people to take care of her. She feels like a robot, turned off after experiencing a short-circuit and is in schedule for a reprogram. She feels like an old rag doll, once so deeply adored by her owner and yet was left to rot in the attic a few years later. No, wait. Scratch all of that, Minnie feels like nothing.

The pits of her stomach growl as Yuqi passed by her, the younger girl couldn't help and laugh but with a tinge of worry in her tone.

"Unnie, after we clean up, we're going to cook some dinner okay?"

Minnie only nodded, Yuqi seemed to be satisfied with that and went back to her business. She turned on a red switch at the base of the machine and the sucking air started to make itself known. Minnie eyed her carefully as Yuqi pointed the nozzle towards the piano keys, getting every crevice that had been infiltrated by soil. She couldn't help but touch the area where the pot had hit on the center of the instrument. She dusted it off a little before aiming the vacuum towards the floor.

Yuqi was always on her feet when it came to Minnie. They've been friends for a long time and not once has Yuqi faltered in aiding Minnie with whatever she needed. Minnie sighs, she doesn't know if she's lucky to have Yuqi or not, someone who checks on her regularly and actually cares for her is a big deal and she should appreciate she has a friend that is willing to go above and beyond just for her. However, she just wants to stop being a burden to Yuqi's life, to Soyeon's life, to everyone's lives. Who was she in their lives that they have to work so hard just to keep her breathing? She doesn't understand.

Minnie stopped observing her younger friend and instead turned her attention towards Soyeon. The younger girl was crouching by her refrigerator and stocking it with the food from the plastic bags they brought earlier.

Soyeon seemed to notice the presence of eyes on her and looked up to find Minnie.

"Minnie unnie, you'll have enough food for a week, I think." Soyeon smiles, she doesn't mind doing this for her friend. Minnie returns it to her.

Soyeon opens a suspicious plastic container that was left inside the fridge. Her curiosity brought her aback as the stench of soiled pasta bombed her nose as soon as she lifted the cover. It was leftover cream pasta from three weeks ago.

Suddenly, Yuqi stopped the vacuum to get what was lying on top of the piano. She stood on her toes and carefully took the picture frame that had fallen earlier.

"Unnie," she called for Minnie but the latter didn't acknowledge her, the plastic wrapper of a chocolate bar seemed to be more interesting at the moment. Soyeon spares a glance at Yuqi and gestured for her to not continue what she was probably going to say. Yuqi looked at the frame and then back at Minnie. She pursed her lips and let out a sigh, she placed the frame on the coffee table, the shattered glass making a tingle of noise as it lay on the wooden surface. Yuqi went back to vacuuming.

It was quiet while the two were cleaning. It felt like time had lapsed as the pair moved back and forth while Minnie sat still, unmoved on the couch.

Minnie sighs.

She was at her breaking point, if there is still anything more to break.

She wonders how it came to be, her once joyous and bright personality down the drain in a glimpse. She thought she could recover quickly and get back up on her feet, but what was holding her back this time? 

Has she even let go yet? Was she ready to move on? Questions that knocked in her head made it harder for her to think, harder for her to feel. Her heart whimpers as the questions came, one after the other, questions she still doesn't have answers to. Her body seems to be taking the toll for the tardiness of her mind and heart. She has been alone for three weeks and she has never been in a state as bad as where she is now.

It hasn't always been like this.

_Three Weeks Ago_

_Yuqi pulled the dining chair out before she sat down with a plate of cream pasta._

_"Please tell me you'll finish that," Minnie sneers at her friend who had gotten way too much for her small figure to handle, "I can't keep that in the fridge, it'll taste different tomorrow when I reheat it."_

_Yuqi scoffs, "Unnie, you underestimate me. I haven't eaten all day, I'm gonna pour this down my throat, no worries."_

_The two started digging into their pasta noodles as the clock hits eight in the evening._

_Minnie lays her fork down the side of her plate, "Thanks for coming over, Yuqi. If it weren't for you, I wouldn't have gotten up at all today." She smiles, sincere, it even reaches her eyes._

_"It's no problem. I'm sorry I come by less often though. Things have been tough at work." Yuqi twirls the noodles on her fork and puts it in her mouth. Minnie had to laugh._

_Yuqi made an effort to check on Minnie everyday for the past couple of months. The frequent visits dwindled to thrice a week after Yuqi got promoted and went down to once a week when Soyeon and her moved to another, further apartment._

_"That's okay," Minnie takes her fork to play around with the contents of her plate, "I feel really bad that you have to take care of me, like I'm some baby that needs a nanny."_

_Yuqi takes a while to chew her food and gestures for Minnie to wait for her answer, Minnie chuckles at her friend._

_"Don't be, we've all had it rough and sometimes we just need a little push to get back up on our feet again." The younger girl smiles and went to twirl another two-inch thick swirl of pasta into her fork._

_"I couldn't just leave you alone, you're my best friend."_

_Minnie grins, though a question had popped into her head, "How is Shuhua?"_

_Yuqi takes a while again to reply, she seems to be taking her pride in eating the plate of pasta very seriously._

_"She's doing great, actually. She went back to school not too long ago."_

_Minnie widens her eyes at the news, "Really, I thought you said she was done for good?"_

_Yuqi shakes her head, "Yeah but apparently her friend came through to her and now she's taking her masters."_

_"Kinda happy for her actually, at least she's not wasting her time waiting for people to hire her. It's good that she found something else to do," Yuqi added._

_"What about Soyeon, how are the two of you doing in the new place?"_

_Yuqi's eyes seem to light up at the mention of their new apartment, "It's such an amazing place and a very amazing deal if you ask me," She raises her eyebrows up and down. They had gotten it at a fair price through a friend that Soyeon once worked with and they were settled as soon as Yuqi saw that the old owners had left a waterbed and beanbags. "Since we have Haku and Mata, it's never too lonely when one of us goes out. The view, so amazing. The price, so cheap. The distance from our workplaces, so near!"_

_Minnie is happy to know that her friends are doing well, though she can't say the same for herself. She can't admit that she needs help. Not even long after Yuqi leaves her alone, she goes haywire. Yuqi had even begged Minnie to let her stay the night with her just so Minnie would have company, but it was already too much to ask for with what Yuqi was already doing for her. Her friend still had a life to live and dreams to fulfill, she is not going to let her grown, sulky ass to get in the way of this girl and her dreams._

_"Shuhua already came over to check it out and visit the dogs. We were pretty convinced she only came for the dogs because she didn't even get off the couch as soon as she saw them." Yuqi went on about how Shuhua has visited them often._

_Minnie seemed to have gotten distracted while Yuqi talked about Shuhua and her mind went to other places, Yuqi noticed this and decided to bring a topic up._

_"Shuhua told me to stop buying you microwaveable convenience store food because it was bad for your health but I can't really cook," Minnie was surprised to hear that and it snapped her back to reality. She didn't think that Shuhua would even care about her. "Soyeon can cook but she never cooks anything healthy so it would probably be as bad as convenience store food."_

_Yuqi noticed that Minnie hadn't spoken again after that, the older girl was looking down at her plate and moving a bit of ham across the ceramic._

_"Shuhua isn't mad at you, you know?"_

_Minnie nods. She could feel her eyes start to pulse and her throat start to tighten._

_Yuqi pouted and was hesitating to say anything after that. She could see Minnie starting to fold back in again. She couldn't leave the girl at this state. She thinks, they were talking about Shuhua anyway, could she really bring it up again seeing that Minnie was already like this at the mention of their friend?_

_"Unnie–"_

_"I'm okay," Minnie sniffles, "I was just a little surprised, that's all. Thank you for telling me."_

_The older girl went back to taking a few pieces of food and eating them while Yuqi kept her eyes on her in worry. She glanced at the clock and she only had fifteen minutes left before Soyeon arrives._

_"Come on," Yuqi shovels the last few pieces of pasta into her mouth and stands up to go to Minnie on the other side of the table._

_"What are you doing? You might choke."_

_Yuqi grabs Minnie's wrists and urges for her to stand up._

_"Let's... do something... fun...!" She tried her best to chew and talk at the same time, making her sound like an old man trying to talk without his dentures. Minnie laughs at this but lets Yuqi guide her to wherever the younger one wants to take her._

_Yuqi ends up taking her outside to stargaze. Sitting on Minnie's porch with all the lights off, Yuqi points towards the sky making many remarks._

_"Look, Unnie! That looks like a turtle."_

_"I think it's a ladle."_

_"Then you must be looking at it wrong," Yuqi bulges her eyes at her friend, "The long string of stars is definitely the neck, and the big circle thing-y has to be the shell." Yuqi circles her fingers around as she points to the stars gleaming in the sky._

_Minnie scoffs, "I think Google would say otherwise."_

_"Oh yeah?" Yuqi challenges, she fiddles her pockets for her phone without moving the tease stare-off with Minnie and brings it up to look on Google._

_While the two were fighting about constellations, the sound of a motorbike coming closer could be heard. The brakes squeak as they stopped the vehicle in front of Minnie's gate and the rider turns off the engine._

_Soyeon takes off her helmet to breathe the cold night air. It was a long way to Minnie's house from her workplace but she had to pick Yuqi up earlier, any later than this they'd get caught in traffic. She sits on her bike to text her girlfriend but Minnie's laugh and Yuqi's voice caught her attention first. The two were outside._

_"Ya! How could you possibly know that? You had to look that up." Yuqi challenges, her voice echoed outside and Soyeon could only chuckle at the frustration in Yuqi's tone._

_"I went to elementary school and listened, Yuqi." Minnie's taunting voice followed right after and it actually caught Soyeon off guard. Minnie sounded... normal._

_She doesn't know if she should ruin the moment and ring the doorbell to pick her girlfriend up or stay and listen to the two of them laugh and bicker. It's been a long time since she's heard her friend laugh and it's pulling at her heart-strings. Only Yuqi could do that._

_The pair continue to argue and talk while Soyeon sits outside with the mosquitoes. She tried her best not to laugh when Yuqi made corny jokes or when Minnie brought up something embarrassing Yuqi did in the past. They hadn't noticed her presence yet, it's weird. Her engine and brakes would have given her away in the first place but maybe the two were too busy Google-ing about constellations for them to notice that she had arrived._

_And so, Soyeon stayed outside. To listen, to see. It must be an exaggeration for her to say that she was reliving what it was like before... but she really was. She missed her girlfriend and her friend talking like they had time in their control and laughing until their stomachs hurt. It was like she was with them back when everything was still fine._

_But Minnie might need some time for herself, right? In order to recover fully, Minnie needs to find herself and recuperate on her own before she's ready to face the world again. Yuqi has been visiting less often than she already was, but is this what was hindering Minnie from finding herself again?_

_She doesn't know. She really doesn't know because she's only here to drop Yuqi off and pick Yuqi up. Minnie hasn't spoken a word to her in months and she is convinced that Minnie just doesn't want to talk to her at all. She really doesn't know, and maybe she shouldn't interfere._

_It was getting late, but Soyeon didn't seem to mind getting stuck in traffic anymore. If it would make Yuqi hug her on her motorcycle together, then she really doesn't mind at all._

_"It's getting late, I should call Soyeon." Yuqi voiced out but Soyeon was too occupied with her thoughts to hear this and all of a sudden her phone rang._

_Soyeon's heart must have jumped out of her chest trying to find where her phone was stashed and Yuqi's confusion grew by the second._

_By the time Soyeon had found her phone, which was in one of the pockets of her jacket twisted around her waist, Yuqi had already gone out the gate with a shocked expression._

_"Oh my god, how long have you been out here?" Yuqi hurries back into the house, leaving the question in the air. She quickly collected all of her stuff before jolting back outside._

_Minnie peeked by the gate to catch Soyeon scratching her head. When they made eye contact, Minnie just smiled and retreated behind the metal door._

_Yuqi reaches the open gate and pecks Minnie on the cheek, "I'll be back soon, okay? I left you with lots of microwaveable lasagna and garlic bread, I know you like those." She reaches her arms out for a hug which Minnie did not fail to be wrapped in._

_"I had a lot of fun tonight, and I hope you did too." Yuqi smiles and it makes Minnie want to never let her go._

_"I did, too. Thank you." Minnie grins and waves as she lets Yuqi go._

_The younger skips on her steps to her girlfriend outside and gives her a peck on the lips and a smack on the arm, "You should have rang the doorbell or something, We could have let you in so you wouldn't get bitten by all these mosquitoes."_

_Before Soyeon could reply, Yuqi was waving goodbye to Minnie and proceeded to hop on the motorcycle._

_She raised her arm up to wish Minnie a good night and started the engine. As the couple slowly drove away, Soyeon could see Minnie eyeing them from afar on her side mirror, before she could see anything more, they already took a turn._

Present

Yuqi moves to sit on the sofa with Minnie, "Unnie, move over, I need to sit down for a while," Yuqi grunts as she plopped on the sofa after Minnie moved to her right.

Soyeon comes out of the kitchen patting her hands clean and walks towards the two of them.

"I finished making lunch. Let's eat together, okay?" Soyeon rests her hand on her hips while talking to the two girls on the couch.

"Aye, aye, Captain." Yuqi lazily salutes and Minnie presses her lips together.

Yuqi turns her head and grabs Minnie's wrists, "Come on, Unnie. Let's get you all cleaned up."

The pair passes by Soyeon and walk up to Minnie's room. Minnie's face remained unchanged, even if she was looking at her now spotless room that Yuqi had cleaned up. It looked like a different place.

Yuqi damps a towel and grabs a fresh set of clothes from Minnie's closet for her to change in. She pats a space on the bed for Minnie to sit, to which the order girl complied.

As Yuqi helped Minnie out of her dirty clothes and into fresh ones while cleaning her hands and face with the damp towel, she felt like this could be the time she could get something out of the girl.

"Unnie," Yuqi started, slowly, trying to read the expression Minnie has on her face.

"I'm really sorry I didn't come over." She said, noting how would Minnie react to what she would say.

"We- I thought you needed some time to yourself, after all, I've come here a lot and I might be stopping you from recovering." Still no reply, Yuqi just decides to vent.

"I know that it's been tough but I couldn't say I know how you feel, it must be entirely different for you and I shouldn't be someone to tell you how you should handle your own emotions," She hesitates to say the rest but if she doesn't bring it up, it will never leave Minnie's mind.

"But, Unnie," She stops again, would this be better or worse for Minnie? Could the picture from their living room be the cause of all this in the first place? If a picture brought so much damage not only to Minnie's home but to Minnie herself, what would bringing up the incident do?

"Uh..." She thinks of something else to say. Even though Minnie probably isn't listening to her now, she feels like she needs to say something else to get something out of her before they spend the entire day together.

"Uh, Shuhua... wants to... come visit you." Yuqi slowly makes up a lie.

"...what?" Minnie questions very softly.

"The food is getting cold!" Soyeon shouts from downstairs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> half of this chapter was a flashback lol. How is it so far? I would love to know what you think!
> 
> Also yes the prompt i made this with was based on Your Lie in April and i havent watched it but my friend told me how it went so no worries i won't go too much with what happened in the anime :>


	3. 3 - What Song Wants, Song Gets

Soyeon ate slower than usual. Carefully twirling each strand of pasta on her fork and chewing it ever so finely.

She was always the one to finish a meal first and often ate her meals with undivided attention. Food was food, and eating something good for your mind and body should not be interrupted by anything other than a cold glass of water to push it down. Today, it was not that case.

She had been eyeing the two other people on the table for a while, observing their awful body language. They sat quietly, the sound of their forks colliding with their ceramic plates was the only thing that could be heard in the well-lit dining room. Something must have come up while she was waiting for them to come down.

On the other side of the table, Minnie sat still. Her eyes never left the garlic bread on her plate of pasta that Soyeon had whipped up. Soyeon could see her arm slightly moving, her hand from under the table must be fidgeting with the cloth of her newly washed pair of pajamas. Pretty much what Soyeon had expected, but she did think that Yuqi might have gotten through the girl at some point throughout the time they had alone.

Yuqi, her girlfriend, was surprisingly put. No stories, no jokes, no laughter. She looked puzzled, like her mind was elsewhere and it had only left her body in place to eat with them at the dining table. Her girlfriend seemed to be deep in thought, Yuqi was never one to keep anything to herself, especially when it was something troublesome. Soyeon wonders what could be running through her head.

It was as if the three of them were living in completely different worlds and Soyeon wasn't having any of it.

She understands Minnie being all quiet, but if the only thing Yuqi has said the entire time is, _"Can you pass me the salt?"_ then something must have gone down between the two of them when they were left alone.

Soyeon wasn't one to keep quiet when certain problems arise. And she most certainly isn't one to ignore something that was obviously off, especially between her girlfriend and her friend.

"Are you guys okay?" Slowly, Soyeon asked. She was hoping to finally break the big hunk of ice that had grown around them whilst they were eating some very hot pasta. Only Yuqi seemed to have acknowledged her because she momentarily stopped swirling noodles on her fork and slowly turned her head to face Soyeon.

"What do you mean?" Yuqi lets out. Her eyes going to Minnie and then back to Soyeon.

"You haven't been talking at all since we sat down, is there something bothering you?" Soyeon moves her left hand to place it over Yuqi's right one, gently caressing it with her thumb as she enunciated the question.

Yuqi smiles, "It's nothing, I guess I'm just tired from all the cleaning." She twists her wrist upwards to intertwine their fingers and Soyeon returns the smile.

"You're getting me worried, is there something the two of you had talked about?" Soyeon presses on, she wasn't going to let this pass. Yuqi spares a glance at Minnie before turning back to her girlfriend, "You have nothing to worry about, okay? I'm alright." Yuqi inched forward to place a kiss on Soyeon's cheek before turning back to her half-finished plate of pasta.

Yuqi is a good kisser, with only a kiss on the cheek, she sends jolts of electricity through Soyeon's nerves. But, Yuqi is a bad liar, and it shows a lot with how she talks and how she chooses to end her sentences. The most obvious giveaway now is how sweaty her palms have gotten in Soyeon's grasp.

Minnie still hasn't acknowledged either of them.

Time passes by and Soyeon tried her best to keep the air alive. When she meant she wanted them to have lunch together, it wasn't just on the physical aspect of it. She was actually hoping that everything would go back to normal, but she was quick to realize that normal isn't going to happen anytime soon.

Soyeon tried, she really did. She brought up some old stories about Mata destroying some of their furniture, or even some of her cringey courting strategies for Yuqi when they were in college. All for a few smacks on the shoulder from her clearly embarrassed girlfriend and two glances from Minnie on the other side of the table. She wonders how Yuqi could have done this during the first few months, it must have been totally draining.

Yuqi could see what Soyeon was doing and she felt bad for giving her a harder time for trying to bond with Minnie again.

She could have just said nothing and Minnie wouldn't totally space out while Soyeon was trying to finally rekindle their friendship. It has been a while since they were together like this and it would have been the perfect time for Minnie to slowly get back up on her feet, one friend at a time.

The past few months of visiting had been rigorous yet fulfilling. Seeing how Minnie improved by the day made Yuqi even more motivated to help, it had gotten her hopeful for what their future could be. Though she noticed that Minnie is having a hard time reconnecting with her friends, like Soyeon. She was sure it was not going to be fixed instantaneously. Soyeon had talked to her about this one day while they were giving the two dogs a bath in their tub.

_"I don't think Minnie wants to talk to me." Soyeon scrubs Haku's legs, not looking up at Yuqi, who was applying shampoo on Mata._

_"No, I think she wants to talk to you. She wants to talk to all of us again. We just have to be patient." Yuqi washes and scrubs Mata's back while consoling her girlfriend._

_The couple sit inside their bathtub with the two dogs, drenched and soapy. Two months had passed after the incident._

_Soyeon purses her lips, "But I've already tried so many times to get her to talk to me but she acts like I'm not even there," Yuqi notices a tone of defeat in Soyeon's voice and it is kind of new to her ears. "Kinda hurts, if I'm being honest."_

_"It took me a while to get her to talk to me too," Yuqi stops the running water to grab a towel and dry Mata off. "I'm sure the right time will come and she'll begin to talk to you again."_

Yuqi noted that Soyeon and Minnie were close, Yuqi and Minnie had met each other when they were kids but they met Soyeon later on in their college years. They were the most stereotypical trio you could ever lay your eyes on. Minnie was there when Soyeon started courting Yuqi, witnessing all the cringey stuff they pulled off. Minnie was there when they became a couple, third wheeling at her finest but none of them seemed to mind at all. And Minnie was there when they broke up for the first time, a shoulder for Yuqi to cry on and a person for Soyeon to consult. She had been there for them, all those days that they spent laughing and crying with each other. She was also there when they realized their love for each other and got back together. Now, Minnie is the one that needed them.

It was just that within the first few months, only Yuqi had been available to visit Minnie because she was still waiting for a job. Soyeon had been busy and was only able to be Yuqi's driver, much to her delight.

Seeing how it was getting her girlfriend frustrated, Yuqi started to think of ways to fix what she did. After a few moments of pouting and hearing enough of Soyeon's lame jokes, an idea popped into her head.

"Minnie unnie," Yuqi called out to her friend, who slowly lifted her head up to look at her. "Soyeon's birthday is coming and," she pauses to glance at a clearly confused Soyeon, "and we're throwing a small get together." She continued and she could see in her peripheral how Soyeon's jaw dropped.

Yuqi takes a deep breath, "I know it's probably too much to ask, but it would mean a lot if you could come." She exhales.

Minnie didn't break eye contact. She stayed put, it was like she never even heard what Yuqi said.

Seeing this, Yuqi decided to continue, "You could finally have a reason to go out and you could finally see our place as well. I think Haku and Mata miss you a lot too, right?" Yuqi adds while she nudges Soyeon to agree.

Soyeon nods but then immediately shakes her head, "But, if you don't want to, that's fine. We were just asking, right, Yuqi?" She nudges Yuqi back, who was bulging her eyes at her.

"Yes, we're just asking. But it would be great to get out of the house once in a while, especially now since it's almost fall and the sun isn't too hot anymore." Yuqi squeezes Soyeon's hand as she presses on to make a valid reason, to which Soyeon tried to retaliate.

"But if Minnie unnie doesn't feel like it, I say we should respect her decision, Song Yuqi." Soyeon ends her statement, but Yuqi wasn't going to let her get the last word.

"But," Yuqi looks at Minnie before continuing to argue with Soyeon, "Shuhua said she wanted to see Minnie unnie and I think this is the perfect opportunity for her to see unnie and also get unnie out of the house while we celebrate your birthday, babe." Yuqi phrases it out as an obvious lie and Soyeon catches it from the moment she mentioned Shuhua. Yuqi's palms were sweating enough to fill a bucket.

Soyeon pauses, she knows Yuqi is lying. But if she were to get Minnie to agree, how are they going to pull off a small get together with only the three of them? Sure, they could get a few drinks and probably act out that everyone cancelled last minute, but that would only lead to breaking Minnie's trust. What is this Song Yuqi up to?

Where on earth did she suddenly have the courage to say that Shuhua would want to talk to Minnie? Shuhua already barely talks to the both of them. The girl has other friends and other businesses to attend to, ever since she went back to study, their conversations have grown scarce.

It's not like Shuhua would actually go, knowing that Minnie would be there. Unless...

"I'm going." Minnie says with the deepest voice out of nowhere, which made the couple jump on their seats to look at her.

"Really?" Yuqi's eyes light up hearing the other girl talk. Minnie nods, "I agree that it's time for me to go out," she pauses. Yuqi can't believe her ears, she's ecstatic, but only for a minute. She didn't think she'd get this far... Now what? 

"I also can't turn Shuhua down," Minnie continues and Yuqi gulps. Oh boy, she immediately forgot about the whole meeting Shuhua thing that she made up. "I feel like I need to talk to her as well." Minnie adds.

Soyeon is at loss for words, she's thinking about how this is all going to work. She turns to Yuqi, who also looks at her. Yuqi looks like she's put together, but with how much her knee is shaking right now says otherwise.

"I think you two should go," Minnie speaks up before a low roll of thunder growled from a distance, "the weather might not be so good today."

The couple turn to each other to see if the other agrees with Minnie or not. Yuqi seems hesitant. She just left Minnie for a long time and they came back to her in this state. She'll probably only have another free day next week and she was not considering to leave Minnie alone anymore.

While Yuqi battled with her thoughts, Soyeon seemed to be scared. Minnie looks like she's giving them a warning signal or something. Though the couple is prepared for any sort of weather disagreement, she feels like Minnie doesn't want them here anymore.

"Minnie, I can't leave you alone like this..." Yuqi gestured to the half cleaned house, "I felt really bad for being away for too long, and I want to help you."

Minnie looked as if she considered what Yuqi said. Meanwhile, Soyeon still thinks they should go. Minnie still hasn't spoken to her, she feels like she's unwanted here.

"Okay, I'll help clean the house. Let me take a shower first." Minnie pushed her seat outwards and stood up, she nods at Soyeon and then turns to go upstairs, leaving her cold plate of pasta untouched.

Soyeon turns her head to look at her girlfriend, who had her eyes on the staircase where Minnie had gone. Soyeon moved her hand to touch Yuqi's shoulder and the other girl jumped on contact.

"Jumpy much?" Soyeon teased.

"No, I– I was just surprised she said yes."

Soyeon raised her eyebrows, "So, how exactly are we going to pull off this 'get together' with Miss Yeh Shuhua, who we haven't exactly been in touch with for a while now? Not to mention, did she even say that she wanted to come and see Minnie unnie?"

Yuqi took a deep breath as she also took in all the questions, "The get together is easy," Yuqi bluffs, "you, me, Minnie unnie, Haku, Mata, Shuhua, someone else, yeah. We can pull that off, no _problemo_." Soyeon had to stop herself from rolling her eyes. She wasn't able to.

"And, hey, I've talked to Shuhua a few times in the past few months. She even talked to me about Minnie unnie and advised me to not be such a horrible friend who kept feeding her food from 7/11." Yuqi grabbed her glass of water to take a sip.

"And what about her mentioning she wanted to meet unnie?" Soyeon raised the other problem at hand.

"She– she, uh," Yuqi almost choked on her glass of water while she struggled to form an excuse, "technically, she didn't say that—"

"God, Song Yuqi, what were you thinking?" Sharply inhaling through her nose, Soyeon brought her fingers to her temples as Yuqi tried to defend her answer.

"No, wait, wait. This might actually be good! It's not like they'll even have bad blood or anything against each other anymore, it's been seven months!" Yuqi exclaimed but Soyeon shushed her down to remind her that Minnie was still in the house.

"That's _exactly_ what's wrong with it! Shuhua hasn't had the slightest intention of even thinking about Minnie for _seven months_." Soyeon iterated. "What made you think she'd want to get in touch now? For all we know, she might want to forget about the entire thing!" Now, it was Yuqi's turn to calm Soyeon down.

"Listen, listen okay?" Yuqi whispers, "This whole thing isn't going to get any better if any loose strings are still dangling around." Soyeon closed her eyes and shook her head.

"This is the perfect opportunity for Minnie to start learning how to live like a normal human again."

"But what if she doesn't want to be like a normal human again? What if she just wants to be alone for now? We can't push her to do something she doesn't want to do. You said we should be patient, right?" Soyeon tries her best to reason with Yuqi, but when this girl has a plan, she will stop at nothing to accomplish it. More so, if it's for Minnie.

Yuqi reached out to hold Soyeon's hands, looking her in the eye as calm as she could stay, "Yes, but she said yes. This is going to work, you have to trust me on this."

Soyeon sits up and straightens her posture, she takes a breath and exhales before looking back at Yuqi, "Please tell me you have all of this figured out."

See, Soyeon is technically close with Minnie, but nobody knows Minnie like Yuqi. And if Yuqi was the one who has figured out a way to help Minnie, then what was stopping her from agreeing with the one person that knows Minnie from the tip of her head to the toes on her feet?

"I don't..." Yuqi says and Soyeon ducks her head to her chest, quick to disappoint her like that. "But– but, I will. I just need some time to think this through, okay?" Soyeon nods and Yuqi does the same, "So far, it doesn't look too bad, huh?"

It still surprises Soyeon how positive Yuqi is, even in uncertainty, Yuqi still manages to find a ray of sunshine under such dark clouds.

Speaking of dark clouds, a whole bunch had made its way to their area and is now completely covering the sun. The dining room grows dim and Yuqi stands up to turn on a light bulb, which sparked when she switched it on and didn't light up.

"Um, Babe, do you know how to change a bulb?" Yuqi asks, showing a cheeky grin while looking at her girlfriend.

Soyeon sighs, "Yeah, get me a chair."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm having such a fun time writing this fic! I get to explore the characters deeper as i write and i think that would interest you guys as well!
> 
> so far, i only have an ending, a really rough draft of how it ends and i'm just writing each chapter on its way there. i hope i don't get too lazy to fact check once in a while hehe. (also sorry for all the spelling errors, i don't really read through updates enough to see any lol, hope y'all don't mind).
> 
> hope you guys are enjoying this as much as i am. see you again in a few days~
> 
> -c


	4. 4 - Two Broken Hearts and a House

**TW chapter talks about suicide**

Hot water pelts on the shower tiles, it was static though it was running. It strongly shoots out of the nozzle, the water coming out of the shower head went straight to the floor and into the drain.

Minnie stood still, fully clothed, observing herself on the bathroom mirror.

She picks at the edges of the sink, her bandaged hand laying fondly on top of the white marble. She couldn't feel the cold that settled on the palm of her other hand.

Amidst the quiet roaring of the shower, she could hear her two friends talking and laughing downstairs. The combination of their voices and the shower was enough to get her mind off of the thoughts that wanted to disrupt her, thoughts that have been lingering for too long in the back of her mind.

Minnie shakes her head and glances at the mirror.

She looked at her face, her eyes were lifeless and shallow, they had lost the twinkle she was once known for. Who knew it would only take a few moments to completely extinguish the fire of a person? She mourns for the light that she lost. Dark circles had formed under her lazy hooded eyes, apparent from either the loss or influx of sleep she had been getting. Her hair has been combed down by Yuqi, her bangs had grown past her nose and they were pushed to the side of her face. Her lips were cracked and pale, the lack of water and other nutrients in her body could be observed with just a glance at her mouth. She looked dead already, what made her stop herself from actually being dead though?

_You should just get it over with._

Oh, she just should. She thinks, even if she doesn't want to. Though it makes her think harder. Her eyebrows meet and crease as a question arrived in her head.

What will she be leaving exactly?

She'll be leaving her friends, Yuqi, Soyeon. She'll be leaving her house, she worked her butt off to get this house. That's pretty much it.

_Two broken hearts and a house is not that bad._

Minnie exhales a breath she didn't know she was holding. What was stopping her? Those three weeks that she was left alone, she could have just gotten it over with and she would've finally been happy. Would she really be happy? Is this what she really wanted?

_It is all that's left to do anyways._

Isn't everyone's end point in life is to die someday? What _was_ stopping her from just paying death a visit a few years early? She was always punctual anyway.

The voice in her head doesn't speak but she could feel it lingering. She could feel goosebumps form on her arms, the chills go all the way to the bottom of her spine. It inches slowly through her body. Minnie could feel her lips become cold and light.

Without another thought, she opened the sink drawer, meticulously scanning through its contents. A toothbrush, a toothpaste bottle, a box of tampons, a plastic bag of cotton balls, a bottle of alcohol, and a container full of disposable razors. She grabbed one of the razors and held it by the handle. Slowly moving it's tip, the metal blade shines momentarily, rust that had began to develop on the surface prevented it from reflecting the bathroom light. Oh, wow. Death with a side of Tetanus, great way to spice things up.

She breaks off the plastic handle, tinkering with the blades until she got it bare in her hands.

_One deep slice and it will all be over. The pain. The suffering. Everything will be gone. You won't even feel a thing._

Minnie's heart picks up, it was pounding out of her chest and she could hear every single beat muffled in her ears. It was mocking her, ticking like a bomb. Oh, the things she would do to make the ticking stop because it grew and grew, deafening even. It clouds her mind, all she could see is the blade. She moves it slowly to a pulse point on her wrist. It was all too hazy, she could see the veins on her hands beating along to the sick song that was playing in her head.

She moves it over her skin and takes a deep breath. The inhale made the thumping in her head louder and denser, like she was stuck underwater.

_Let's get this over with, shall we?_

The moment she pointed the tip of the razor on top of the vein on her wrist, Yuqi's boisterous laugh rang through the halls and just for a second, Minnie hesitated. The loud thumping dwindled and became watered down, quiet enough for her thoughts to come through properly without the pressure. Two broken hearts and a house, is it really not that bad, or is it enough?

Yuqi has Soyeon, Soyeon has Yuqi. They'll be fine, right? They have their whole lives ahead of themselves, their whole life with each other.

_Exactly, they have each other. You're just a plus one._

Her mind flashes back to all the memories she's had with Yuqi. Elementary school, high school, college, sleepovers, fights, bar nights, beach days, heartbreaks, hugs, all-nighters, concerts, tears, laughter, pain.

_"I don't know what I would do without you, Minnie unnie." Yuqi tightens her arms around Minnie, enveloping her in a hug she desperately needed as well._

She drops the razor on the floor, her hand shaking and tingling. Her heart is racing, making it hard for her to breathe. The sudden memory that infiltrated her mind left her in a state of shock.

No. No. No. She can't leave Yuqi. She can't break her heart. Yuqi has been there for her all these months, all these years, she can't repay her with death. How was she even so stupid to think about leaving the only people that stayed and loved her even when she didn't love herself.

Minnie thinks back to the long months that had passed. It was in complete disarray, Yuqi was in every single memory she could recall. Yuqi was there. Yuqi was there for her. Yuqi never left. She can't leave Yuqi.

_Yuqi will eventually get over it, get over you, exactly like she did with—_

"NO, STOP!" Minnie closed her eyes, forcing herself to stop thinking. She has to stop thinking. Thinking would only make things worse. She has to breathe and clear her mind.

And so she inhales, she calms herself down, hoping to not make things worse. She wants to be better. She wants to be better for herself and for her friends. 

_Your friends only care about you because you're still alive. Let them live an easy life._

Steam coming from the hot shower just made the environment worse, it was fogging up the room and making it harder for Minnie to breathe. She keeps her eyes closed and tries to focus on the breaths she's taking.

_Why do you think they're staying? They're only there because they pity you._

They don't. They care, they care about Minnie. Soyeon is here because she cares, Yuqi is here because she cares. They...

_"Minnie unnie," Yuqi rests her head on Minnie's shoulder as they breathe in the fresh sea breeze._

_"Hmm?" Minnie hums in response._

_"When Soyeon and I get married, you'll help me with all the wedding stress, right?"_

_Minnie laughs, it's always fun to imagine the future when you're tipsy and happy._

_"Of course I will. Anything for you, Yuqi."_

Minnie tries to rid her head of all the thoughts that came knocking in, good and bad. She opens her eyes to see the bathroom grow dark. She holds her hands over her ears to stop the eerie white noise that was present. The shower sounds like an old rusty engine, or like a heap of metal that was being dragged on the floor and it makes Minnie's ears ring. She wants the ringing to stop, it disrupts her thoughts and makes her lose focus. The steam looks like a furlough ghost, coming out to haunt her and scare her. Her image becomes distorted in the mirror, it blurs and fades the longer she stares. She takes a step back.

_"Unnie, Soyeon's never coming back is she?" Yuqi sniffles, talking for the first time after she calmed down._

_Minnie didn't know what to say, she momentarily stops cleaning up the snack packets and empty bottles on their floor to sit next to her friend, "Maybe you just met each other at the wrong time. The right love and the right time will come to you if it is really meant to be."_

_Yuqi smiles a little, "I wish I could be like you and—"_

"STOP!" Minnie shouts before her memories replayed themselves. She grips on her hair so tight, any more than that she would rip them off. She takes another step back.

_Yuqi holds Minnie's hand, comforting the older girl before she went on stage._

_"You can do it, okay? You've practiced for this every day and you are ready, okay?" Yuqi shakes their intertwined hands and Minnie nods._

_"I'll be watching with my Mom in front okay? Look at me when you get nervous!" Yuqi says before giving Minnie a kiss on her cheek. "Good luck!"_

_Minnie smiles, "Thank you, Yuqi-ya, this one is for you." She walks up the stage and towards a grand piano. The spotlight hitting her eyes, she takes a deep breath before bowing in front of the crowd._

_"Nicha Yontararak, 5th grade, performing a piece for us on the piano." The host says and the crowd claps for her. She looks at the front row, easily spotting a clapping Yuqi, the younger girl gives her a thumbs up._

_Minnie sits on the stool, taking a deep breath, knowing that Yuqi is there for her. She starts to play the piece._

"Please, please stop!" Minnie begs, she begs her own brain. She begs her senses to stop making her feel all the pain.

She takes a moment to look around, she needs something, she needs anything. Her eyes go from paper towels to rusty razors. Everything felt like they were twenty feet away. It was making her disoriented. She looks down to her feet, avoiding the tunnel that had formed in the room. She finds that the floor had shifted and was now covered in blood. She was stepping on warm, fresh blood. Her feet were covered, her toes soaking in the sea of red. She looks at the mirror in front of her, it was cracking, distorting her image. She looks at the shower, the blood was coming from the nozzle, flooding the bathroom with the liquid. Minnie looks at her hand, her own blood dripping onto the pool that had formed on her feet.

She wants to go back to the moment before everything in the world turned red.

_"I had a nice time tonight."_

_Minnie smiles, the most melodious voice she's ever heard just said she had a nice time that night._

_"I'm glad you did, I was hoping you would." Minnie responds, clutching the steering wheel as she holds the feelings she had in her stomach._

_The night was cool and quiet, they had left their windows open. Driving at two in the morning meant no traffic, no rules, no people, no nothing. It was just them and only them._

_"I was with you, of course I would be."_

_Minnie tried, she really did. Holding all of her feelings in was pretty hard work, especially when you're kind of tipsy. Lost in her own thoughts, Minnie kept driving, speeding through an empty crossing._

_The girl on the passenger seat gasped as she turned her body to catch what she had missed, "Kim Minnie, did you just run a red light?"_

_Minnie giggled, "What if I did."_

_"That's dangerous you know."_

_"I'm wild like that," Minnie retorts, "Okay, that sounded awful."_

_"Feisty, I like it."_

_Minnie looks to her side, catching a smile on the lips she wanted to kiss._

_"Well, I like you."_

Minnie couldn't handle it anymore. It didn't stop and it will never stop. She needs to end it, she just wants peace and quiet. Minnie wants to die.

She drops to her knees, the blood splashing around her as she moved her hand through the sea of red. Her eyes were flowing with tears, salty as they could be. She cried while she searched frantically for the razor that she had dropped.

The liquid was opaque and hard to maneuver in. The bandage wrapped around her hand seeped enough red to color it strikingly bright. She crawls on the floor, desperately weaving through the flood. Her hands grasping and scrapping the expanse of the floor.

It didn't stop there.

_Yuqi holds Minnie's hand._

_The older girl sat on the bed, clad with clothes she doesn't own, everything was bright and it hurt Minnie's swollen eyes. She could hear beeping machines, entangled voices, and busy footsteps outside the curtains that act as her walls. There was a tight thing wrapping around her head, hugging her forehead too tight, and stiff casts formed around her legs._

_"You're going to be fine, okay?" Yuqi breathes out, gently rubbing her thumb on Minnie's hand._

_A minute of staring at nothing had passed before the wall of curtains moved to reveal her friend, Soyeon. Her eyes first went to Minnie, they looked at each other for a while, Minnie noted that Soyeon's eyes looked swollen and red, like she just finished crying. Soyeon broke their eye-contact to look at Yuqi, "I need to talk to you." Soyeon says before quickly walking back out, not sparing another look at Minnie._

_Yuqi stands up from her chair, "I'll be right back," she places a kiss on Minnie's cheek, "You'll be okay."_

_Yuqi walks out and disappears behind the curtains._

"I'm not okay." Minnie stops from moving around.

She kneels, feeling her heart open to the thoughts that flooded her brain.

"I was never okay. I have never been okay." She doesn't stop the tears that flowed from her eyes. She sobbed, her heart was giving out. Her chest heaved as she struggled to breathe, her sobs became harder and deeper, like they were slowly unfolding everything that ever happened to Minnie.

_"I don't know what I would do without you." Minnie stares into galaxies encapsulated in the other girl's eyes._

_Locked in their embrace, the girl blushes under Minnie's touch, taking her words into her heart._

_"I love you, Kim Minnie."_

Minnie let's out a scream. It was strikingly loud and deep, coming from the pits of what was left in her heart. It echoed and resonated, trapped in the bathroom walls. It bounced back, creating a rift of sounds that turned to a slicing thin noise. Minnie screams and screams for it to stop.

A banging sound came from the bathroom door and Minnie flinches more. It didn't stop and Minnie covered her ears as they rang.

Not long after, there were keys jingling from the outside, and the door was finally opened to reveal Yuqi and Soyeon standing by the door. They moved back a little as water welcomed their feet as soon as they opened the door.

Yuqi didn't take a second to rush and kneel by Minnie's side.

"Minnie unnie! Oh my god." Yuqi's hands were on Minnie's shoulders as the girl kept crying.

In complete worry and panic, Yuqi gestured for Soyeon to turn off the shower, which had flooded the room with warm water. Soyeon wallows carefully through the bathroom and switches the running water off.

"Unnie, it's okay. It's okay, we're here. We're right here."

Though Yuqi's comforting words were now overpowering the ringing in Minnie's ears and the world has returned to normal, Minnie didn't stop crying.

Yuqi didn't stop rubbing her friend's back as well as she threw out the loudest sobs she's ever heard. Although the cries howled out loud, it doesn't shield Yuqi from hearing her own heart break while being in the scene.

Soyeon stood still in the shower, the tips of her pants soaked in water after she waddled through the flood. She observes the two people kneeling on the floor and a creeping pain inched its way up her stomach to her chest. It was a very depressing sight. Soyeon didn't know what to do.

After a moment of Minnie's non-stop crying, Yuqi looked at Soyeon, her own eyes already red and filled with tears. Her mouth was in a tight frown as she tried her best to keep herself from crying as well. When Soyeon saw this, she walked towards the two of them and kneeled on the floor as well. She puts one of her arms around Yuqi and the other one around Minnie. She pulled them both in for a tight hug, and not long after, Yuqi started crying as well. Yuqi clutched Soyeon's shirt as she weeped on her shoulder.

The night was going to be long in this house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n
> 
> oh man that was hard to write ksksks
> 
> i'm back! midterms aren't over but i'm so done with it already dkdjdkdjd i just wanted to publish something before i go back to work on stuff for school.
> 
> this chapter hits a little hard and raises a lot of questions as well, if you do have some, don't be afraid to comment anything or ask me on my curiouscat! i'm not quite sure if you guys are following the story as i wanted you to so please tell me your thoughts!
> 
> the next one will hopefully be up in a few days so hand in there! i forgot to mention how slowly i'm pacing this lol i hope you'll all stay and read until the end~
> 
> -c


	5. 5 - Past, Present, Future

It starts to rain.

The dark clouds that made their way on top had released the tears they've been holding as they crawled. A shower covers the scene and fogs up the view, making it hard to see anything that was once visible outside. The rain brought a cool breeze that wafted through the house's open windows like a cat walking graciously into a room.

Soyeon leans her back on the wall, clutching her arms close to her chest as she moved her toes in her damp socks. It squished and squashed, the more Soyeon moves it, the more water comes out of the wooly fabric.

She's outside Minnie's bedroom, the door was shut and only Yuqi and Minnie were occupying the room. Soyeon had retreated outside after helping Yuqi carry Minnie's tired body to her bed, she made an excuse about checking if anything was ruined by the small flood that formed in the bathroom in order to leave the two alone. However, as soon as she closed the bedroom door, she listened quietly as Yuqi tried to console their friend.

She looked like a child that listened to her parents' conversation, masked by the darkness of the night. Only this time, she was eavesdropping to her friends' conversations. Not only because she was curious, but also because she cared.

Nothing much has happened, a few sniffles and whimpers, some encouragement from her girlfriend as well. Though Soyeon wanted to help, she doesn't exactly know how to. That's why she left the room. There were still some high walls between her and Minnie, she's not sure if she would make the situation better or worse.

Minnie still hasn't talked to her, and her gut tells her that Minnie doesn't want her there. But, still, that doesn't stop her from growing concerned. The worry feels a lot more different now than it used to be, maybe because she actually saw what has been happening to Minnie the past few months she wasn't present.

Soyeon knows she should also check if there were some stuff that were washed over by the water but she couldn't help but stay and wait until she's sure that Minnie is fine.

Well if she were speaking the truth, then Minnie is not fine. Nowhere near fine at all.

Besides from the fact that she just experienced her friend have a whole mental breakdown, Soyeon couldn't erase the image of Yuqi struggling to keep herself strong as she comforted Minnie. She couldn't forget how her lips quivered and how her eyes glistened with tears. She doesn't know how bad it must have felt for Yuqi to see Minnie in that situation. All she could do was offer a shoulder for her girlfriend to cry on, and to be honest, that sucks.

And so she waits, she waits with her thoughts hanging from her head, her toes warm and damp, and her ears listening for all the silent noises that it can.

Will Minnie ever recover?

She starts to question the integrity of her friend. Minnie has been showing a lot of signs of recovery, but every time Yuqi thinks Minnie is all set and ready to go, she spirals back down to the very first step. It must disheartening to experience that over and over for the past year. Soyeon still doesn't know how Yuqi does it.

Yuqi has been through it all. In fact, they all have, but Yuqi was the only one that stayed by Minnie's side. Soyeon wallows deeper into the pool of shame.

Between the two of them, Soyeon is always known as the strong one. The one who holds on, the one who perseveres. She let down Yuqi once when they first broke up in college, she gave up and she let go. But as soon as she regained herself and was hit by the realization of how stupid she was to leave and give up in the first place, she went straight back to the only girl who she knew that could love her like no other. She's lucky she found Yuqi still waiting for her, Yuqi counted every second that she was gone.

Soyeon noticed that Yuqi grew stronger as well. Not just physically, Yuqi was really interested in sports back in college, but also mentally and emotionally as well. So it isn't much to take in that Yuqi has been fighting for Minnie all these months and not once has she faltered in giving Minnie the support she needed.

While getting lost in her thoughts, Soyeon didn't notice the door open beside her.

Yuqi's head poked out the door, shocked that she found her girlfriend waiting by the room.

"Babe–"

"AH! Wh–What?" Soyeon bounced on her heels as she turned around, surprised to hear someone speak all of a sudden.

Yuqi's lips twitched upward at her girlfriend's reaction and went out of the room, closing the door behind her.

"How is she?" Soyeon whispered. Instead of answering her question though, Yuqi walks towards the stairs and gestures for Soyeon to follow her with a nod of her head.

Soyeon grabs her wet shoes from the floor and goes to follow Yuqi. As she faces the view of the staircase, she finds her girlfriend standing still by the foot of the steps. Soyeon walks down, careful not to slip with her wet socks on the equally wet wooden floorboards.

"Hey, are you okay?" Soyeon inches closer to Yuqi. As soon as Soyeon placed a hand on Yuqi's shoulder, the girl turns around to wrap Soyeon in a hug. Soyeon doesn't hesitate to bring her arms around her girlfriend as she shushes the now crying Yuqi. Soyeon was one step up the stairs from her, and the younger girl was quick to tuck her face into the older one's neck, Soyeon's chin on top of Yuqi's head.

"Hey, hey, babe. It's okay. You can let it out."

And Yuqi does let it out. Her sobs come out hoarse yet disgruntled. With every heave, Yuqi's cries come out louder and Soyeon could feel her heart shatter. She could feel the heaviness of each sob as Yuqi held on tighter and tighter, scrunching up a bunch of Soyeon's jacket as she clung with her life.

"I'm so... tired, Soyeon-ah." Yuqi lets out and Soyeon wants to punch a wall. Yuqi sounded so drained. Her voice gave out and she was catching her breath as if the room was losing air.

"It's been months like this. Over and over, and I tried everything that I could to bring her back." The more Yuqi talks, the worse it felt. Soyeon could see how Yuqi was deteriorating as well. Yuqi used to stand high and proud, her chin always up and her chest always out. To see how slouched in Yuqi was right now as she held on while she cried was the weakest of the weak Soyeon has ever seen. She should have thought about something to fix it all as soon as she could.

"She's never coming back, is she?" Yuqi asked and all the pain could be felt with the tone of her voice.

"Minnie unnie is never coming back. We lost Minnie." Yuqi just cries. How often does Soyeon note that Yuqi wears her heart on her sleeve, and with that large, beating heart displayed at her very front, Soyeon could see it breaking right then and there.

As Yuqi's sobs grow, Soyeon takes the initiative to lead her to a dining chair. She broke their embrace and sat Yuqi down, pulling another chair for her to sit on in front of her girlfriend. Yuqi had retreated her arms close to her chest and raised her hands to her face. Soyeon takes Yuqi's hands away from covering her red eyes and holds them in her own.

Now that they were holding hands, Yuqi's head was hanging low, the lowest that Soyeon has ever seen. This is already all too familiar. This kind of situation has happened many times in the span of the long months after the incident. But, in all those nights that Yuqi cried, she has never once lost hope in her eyes. She always followed her cries with a _"We just need more time."_ or with a _"We aren't lucky today."_ But now, her eyes were deep and red, they looked like blackholes rather than the patches of glitter than Soyeon has grown to love.

Yuqi has always viewed things from the brightest point-of-view possible. Though Yuqi knows that they were dealing with something that will never be the same as it was in the past, Soyeon didn't know that Yuqi still held on to the fact that maybe she could bring everything back to normal. Yuqi always holds on, Yuqi never lets go.

"Hey," Soyeon caresses Yuqi's hands with her thumbs, "It's okay. You need to take a break as well."

Yuqi continues to cry, "I'm so tired, Soyeon. I'm so fucking tired!" Yuqi presses her eyelids closed as she exclaimed, causing Soyeon to jump in her seat. Yuqi bows her head, her chin buries further into her chest, squeezing Soyeon's hands as she wept.

"I don't understand. I don't understand how this is going to get better. I feel like I'm– I'm in a race I never even wanted to be in!" Yuqi curls her hands into fists. She was shouting, she was mad, and Soyeon could understand. She just kept silent.

"I've spent this entire year in this fucking house and we haven't moved a single inch from the starting line and I'm– I'm– I don't know what else to do. I don't know what to do to get us out of this alive. I don't know what to do at all!" Yuqi lashes out, tears still streaming from her face. This was a sight that Soyeon wasn't prepared to see at all.

Yuqi often lashes out, it was her way of releasing all the pent up negative emotions in her body. But this time, it's different. Soyeon could feel it as a rush of goosebumps traveled up her arms. Yuqi isn't releasing her anger out, she was internalizing it.

"I shouldn't have let her. I shouldn't have listened to you about her needing time for herself because _this_ is what happens when you leave someone who doesn't have a will to live anymore alone!" Ah, that hits hard, but Soyeon didn't budge. A lot of people say things they don't mean when they're frustrated and angry. Soyeon just needs to keep herself calm until the raging storm is over.

But Yuqi isn't done and she digs deeper, deeper into her mind filled with regrets and mistakes. Then and there, Soyeon could see that Yuqi was blaming herself from what is happening to Minnie. She's blamed herself from the very start.

"I did this..." Yuqi's voice comes out shaking, her hands mimic the vibrations of her cries, they grow cold. "If I hadn't... If I just didn't... If I just... I— fuck." Her breath quickens as she held herself from revisiting the past. "So fucking— UGH!" Yuqi grunts.

Soyeon was caught in the middle. Holding herself back as she watches the love of her life get shrouded with darkness. She could see it in Yuqi's eyes, reliving everything that has ever happened. Yuqi was going mad.

Suddenly the girl laughs and that hit Soyeon with a little worry. Yuqi scoffs and looks up, stopping the tears from flowing down her face and giving herself time to breath in properly.

" _I_ should have fucking died." She announced. A terrifying wish, echoing not only through the walls of the house but also in her head. It plays on repeat, and Yuqi tries to block it out but she couldn't. She stares at the ceiling, listening to her own thoughts and getting lost in the flood of her shame.

Yuqi takes a deep, shaky breath after every thing she just said. It takes her a moment to take it all in, coming down from the high and quickly realizing that she wasn't alone. The second it hit her, she shot her head back down and her eyes grew worried for the girl holding her hands.

"Soyeon-ah..."

"Are you done?" Soyeon quietly lets out, she continues to caress Yuqi's hands with her thumbs.

Yuqi nods. That was the cue. Soyeon tightens her grip around Yuqi's hands. It takes her a while to actually start talking, what Yuqi said made an impact to her as well, and she can't convince herself enough that everything that was cried out was only driven by anger and emotion.

"I'm sorry." Yuqi muttered. It made Soyeon's heart sink a little bit. She didn't want Yuqi to feel like she was making another mistake. She's just human.

They've always sorted things out, this wasn't an exception.

"We're in this together, okay?" Soyeon calmly says and the other girl nods in response.

"I know what you feel about everything," Soyeon starts and Yuqi listens, "As time passed by, we thought that our wounds would heal, and because all of us suffered differently, other wounds took longer to heal while some have already formed scars."

Soyeon was careful, going over each and every point that she got one by one.

"Like us, we've already developed those scars. They don't hurt anymore, but they're large and they're there to stay. They stain and they remain. But they also hold all the history of what happened."

Yuqi listens intently. Listening to Soyeon has stabled her heart and mind from floating somewhere she didn't want herself to be in. Soyeon's hands held hers, and it kept her from straying away.

"Because of that history, we are often reminded of the times when we didn't have those scars, right?" Yuqi nods.

Soyeon rests her elbows on her knees as bent her body forward to get closer to Yuqi, "We also think about the stuff we could have done to prevent the wounds from even happening in the first place, right?" Yuqi nods again, locking eyes with her girlfriend. It made everything more calming, much, much better than how she felt earlier. It seemed that the broken record in her head had stopped playing.

"Though much time has passed, we have to acknowledge the fact that we've healed. We learned from the mistakes we've done in the past. That's good, right?" Soyeon plays around with Yuqi's hands, tossing them up and down, trying to cheer the girl up while talking to her heart.

"But, the sad thing about time is, you could never bring back the past." Soyeon lowers her pitch, delving into deeper matters. She gripped Yuqi's hands and clutched them nearer to her chest.

"We can only reminisce the memories we've made, ponder on our mistakes, live in the present, and look out for the future." Soyeon's words come out slow and soft, like she was talking to a child. But Yuqi didn't mind, she needed to be reminded of how it was to be calm. Soyeon's voice washed over her like the calm waves of the sea that walk on the fine, beach sand.

"I know it's hard. It's hard to grieve and suffer our losses, but we have to move on. If we don't, we'll always be stuck in our past, forgoing everything that is happening in the present, and never make it into the future." Yuqi ducks her head again, taking Soyeon's words to her heart.

"Sooner or later, Minnie unnie will move on too. Her wound will heal too. We just have to be patient and determined to help the friend who has always been there for us as well." Yuqi nods, she takes a deep breath to collect herself from everything that just happened. She thinks about the present, where they are now, what they are doing, and why they are doing it. She thinks about the future, what it holds for them, what it has in store for their lives together. Lastly, she thinks of the past, the experiences that brought her to where they are today, the mistakes that were her best teachers, and the losses that carved sorrow deep into their hearts.

But, the deeper the sorrow carves into your soul, the more joy you can contain.

Yuqi nods and nods, coming down from the height of her emotions, keeping her feet on the ground. She takes one of her hands out of Soyeon's grasp to wipe her tear-riddled face.

"You're the best person ever, you know that?" Yuqi sniffles and Soyeon smiles.

"What are you talking about? No one can beat the one and only Yuqirin." Soyeon teases, which made Yuqi laugh. Yuqi holds her arms out for Soyeon and the other girl did not hesitate to stand up and give her girlfriend a hug.

"Now, I'll go and look after Minnie," Soyeon announces and Yuqi looks up at her, "What will I do then?"

"You go and think of a way to call Miss Yeh Shuhua and get this whole plan of yours up and running," Soyeon states as she bops Yuqi's nose with her finger, "I trust you, okay? We're gonna get Minnie unnie up and running in no time," Soyeon smiles with her eyes, "One friend at a time."

With Yuqi's arms still around Soyeon, she tightens her grip around Soyeon's hips and stands up, lifting the smaller girl from the floor.

"AH, YUQI PUT ME DOWN!"

Yuqi doesn't.

She hops and she runs around the living room. Though Soyeon wanted to strangle her, she's glad to see the sparkle back in Yuqi's eyes, how they curved upward along with her smile.

Yuqi spins them around twice, her laughter collides with Soyeon's death threats before she moves to put the girl down before they both fall on the floor.

After laughing and heaving from all the lifting, she catches Soyeon with an embrace around the older girl's shoulders.

"Thank you." Yuqi leans in for a kiss which Soyeon did not reject. Their lips meet with a tinge of saltiness to it, something they could ignore while their lips moved around, kissing, even sucking a little.

"For what?" Soyeon mumbles into their kiss and made their teeth bump. Yuqi laughs and brings Soyeon closer to her body as possible.

"Everything."

They both smile into their lip locks before, completely ridding the air of all the negative energy that it had collected, only filling it with the love they have for each other.

Yuqi pulls away, a cheeky grin now plastered on her puffy face. It made her look like a puppy.

"What?" Soyeon grew wary from the stare Yuqi was giving her, only to receive a set of jumping eyebrows and a loud announcement.

"You're gonna have the best birthday party ever!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> nevies! are you streaming DUMDi DUMDi? it's so upbeat and i really love listening to it! also, are you voting for idle for the VMAs? if not then go for it!! they're nominated for BEST K-POP and doesn't that just make you feel proud? go now and vote!
> 
> yuyeon chapter! ugh i love yuyeon.
> 
> if you have any questions or u just wanna say hi or something but you don't want to comment, my curiouscat link is in my bio! also the link to my twitter, i have a few stories written there as well, they're sooshu. i might publish them here real soon!
> 
> that's all! have a great day guys!
> 
> -c


	6. 6 - Glimpse

_7 years ago_

_Minnie fiddles to open her round glittery wallet, she takes out a few bills and some spare change to satisfy the amount of her purchases. Handing it to the cashier, she restlessly waits for the young girl on the other side of the counter to bag her items. The girl looks like she needed to go to bed, her arms were dragging on the cash register and even moved slower when she packed the chips, chocolate, and candy Minnie had hurriedly picked while walking down every aisle of the convenience store._

_The cashier finishes bagging Minnie's array of treats and hands them over the counter with the six-pack of various soju. The bottles clink and ting, moisture that had developed on the outside of the glass dripped on the counter as Minnie was figuring out how to carry what she bought._

_"Thank you. Have a good night!" Minnie smiles at the teenager and moves towards the glass double doors. She turned around and pressed her back against one of the doors, pushing herself backward in order to open it for her to get out. She spares one last glance at the cashier, pressing a smile on her lips and a tug at her brows before she leaves the store._

_And with that, Minnie sprints back to the direction of her campus, not minding the amid clinks of the bottles that hit each other every time she takes a step._

_The cold itched at her cheeks and she moves her other hand, the one carrying the plastic bag of processed food, to touch her face and warm it up a little. Her huffs of air turn to clouds of steam, she looked like a finished kettle while she ran._

_She passed by some friends she met throughout the course of her college life, they all greeted her with confused brows and tinging mouths as Minnie replied to every one of them with, "Can't talk, gotta go, bye!"_

_She reaches their campus and skillfully threads her way to find the route that leads to their dorm rooms. It was dark, and that one streetlight at the front of their building, that she was hoping was working, was busted again tonight. It flicked yellow bouts of light every now and then, accompanied by that sick magnetic sound that clearly signifies it was broken._

_Minnie reaches the gates of their building, she places the bottles and plastic bag on the floor in order to fiddle in her pockets the collection of keys she had. With every flicker of light, Minnie flipped through the various metal keys which had a label stuck on their heads._

_Bathroom. Basement. House. House 2. Backdoor. Yuqi's dorm. The other bathroom. Lock. Gate!_

_She hurried thrusts the key into the slot on the metal gate, which had resulted in getting some skin on her finger caught with the key._

_"Ah!" She yelps, "Ah, that hurt." She hisses while shaking her hand frantically._

_Though the momentary pain was not going to stop her, she bends down to reach her goods and bolts inside the building. She races up the steps to reach the third floor, heaving heavier with each floor she reached. She ran through the corridor, her converses slapped the polished tiles as she went further and further. Her footsteps echoing through the halls and it stopped as she reached her destination. She stands in front of a door with a metal '308' bolted on the panel. Her shoulders move up and down as she catches her breath, she ran an awful lot. She quickly knocked on the door._

_A few seconds of no one answering, she grunts and grabs the assortment of keys in her pockets again._

_The other bathroom. Lock. Gate. Bathroom. Basement. House. House 2. Backdoor. Yuqi's dorm!_

_She now carefully inserted the key into the doorknob in order to avoid mishaps like earlier. She turns the knob as soon as it clicks and peeks inside the room. It was dark and the only light that was on was Shuhua's desk lamp._

_Shuhua wasn't there though. The room was empty, well, mostly empty. It was still spiffy and clean, the only difference is the instead of Yuqi manically working on her desk, she was wrapped in her blankets on her bed, facing away from the door. Minnie walks inside, her array of purchases rustling and clinking with her movement. She uses her back to close the door._

_She walks over to the bed with a lump, the lump was sniffling and jolting every now and then, with every sniff it moved._

_"Yuqiqi," Minnie cooed as she placed the plastic bag and soju six-pack on Yuqi's desk. "I'm here."_

_Minnie sits on the side of Yuqi's bed, causing it to dip towards her, turning Yuqi slightly._

_Yuqi's head peeks out from the mountains of blankets she was wrapped it. Her eyes were bloodshot and swollen, tears still streaming down her face. Her nose red and plump with every sniffle she makes. Her mouth in a tight-lipped pout which Minnie finds adorable._

_"Hey there," Minnie reaches out to brush some strands of Yuqi's hair off her face. It had stuck on her cheeks and forehead with both sweat and tears. "I'm here, Yuqi-ya."_

_And with that gentle statement from the older girl, Yuqi's eyebrows suddenly meet and her eyes went shut. She lunges forward, removing her blankets, and reaches out to envelop Minnie in a hug._

_Yuqi cried and cried for a good hour, Minnie was just there to give the comforting pats on the back and the warm hugs her friend desperately needed._

_The stars move across the night sky and the snacks and bottles were getting depleted by the second. Minnie took her time to drink, she hasn't eaten dinner yet. As soon as she figured out what had happened, she bolted from her last lecture to buy the goods from the convenience store. Yuqi, on the other hand, did not hold back. She munched and she chugged happily through the night. Minnie figured that it was her friend's way of coping. She guesses it was better to munch and chug than to cry and heave._

_Yuqi stopped for a moment, she places her third bottle down on the bed and stares at the crumbs left on her sheets._

_"She left." Yuqi roughly lets out._

_"She just fucking left." Yuqi presses her lips together and shakes her head as she gathered what she was going to say._

_"I was asking, I was crying, I was standing right there," The younger girl continues to speak. Minnie only listened, as long as Yuqi was comfortable telling her, she will listen._

_Yuqi seemed to hold the tears back from falling, she was choking on it. She couldn't piece out what exactly it was she wanted to say. She was full of emotions. Anger, sadness, guilt, remorse, regret. It was all bubbling inside of her and she didn't know what to feel. If it was even right to cry. Was it? She doesn't know. She just needed to cry._

_All of a sudden, she snickers, catching the listening Minnie off-guard, "She left," Yuqi laughs to herself. "All these years of sacrifice and love and pain and she decides to leave just because..." She pauses, "because... I don't know." Yuqi takes a swig, "I don't know."_

_Yuqi continues to drink and Minnie continues to listen. This night was the first of many and Minnie found herself growing concerned as the weeks and months pass by. Of course she was already concerned from the beginning, her friend was deeply hurting, and her other friend was... nowhere to be found. Minnie finds herself in the tiny convenience store a lot more often._

_"You don't look like you're an alcoholic."_

_The snappy remark from the other side of the counter surprises Minnie, she was busy staring at the flyer for a music show to notice the odd looks the cashier was giving her._

_"E-excuse me?" Minnie questioned, in all the months she frequented this store, this girl has not talked to her at all. She only tells Minnie the price of what she needed to pay and then she doesn't speak again. Which was the reason why Minnie was so shocked to hear her say anything other than currency._

_"You came here every week since the beginning of the year to buy six-packs and unhealthy food yet you don't look like you've been drinking or eating any of these," The cashier pointed out the items she was bagging. Minnie would take it as a compliment, she thinks. But knowing the context behind of her purchases did not lift her mood up. "What's your deal? Why would you willingly halve your allowance buying this shit?" The cashier continues to question, which was far too touchy for Minnie to answer._

_Minnie smiles as she takes the plastic bag and the six-pack from the curious cashier, "It's the only thing I can do right now to help," Once she was set to run back to her dorm, she faces the cashier again and sends her a smile, "Thanks again, have a good shift!"_

_And it goes on for another month or so, but Minnie just waits. It's her patience that she's proud of. And if it's her patience that will help Yuqi then so be it._

_One night, as they finished their weekly drinking session, Yuqi didn't talk a lot. She only laughed and cried and gagged as she took swig after swig. Yuqi sat on her bed, taking deep breaths as she calmed herself down. Minnie took this time to clean around. She didn't own this room yet she's cleaned it a million times already. She takes the bottles from the floor and the plastic wrappers and tosses them one by one in a trash bin on the other side of the room._

_She passes by Shuhua's desk, a little messy but she didn't dare to move anything that wasn't hers. The desk lamp they've been using has dimmed over time and Shuhua accused them of ruining her favorite lamp. Minnie promised to buy Shuhua a new one if it ever busts because of them. Minnie's eyes perked when she caught a glimpse of a picture frame with three women. One was Shuhua, holding the camera in her hands. Another one was Shuhua's friend, the same year as Minnie, holding her hands with a peace sign as she joined the picture. The last one was—_

_"Unnie," Yuqi's voice snapped Minnie away from looking at the picture frame._

_Yuqi didn't talk again for a few seconds, so Minnie just assumed she was thinking about what she wanted to say. Minnie goes back to cleaning and she was caught off guard by the question raised._

_"Soyeon's never coming back is she?" Yuqi sniffles, talking for the first time after she calmed down._

_Minnie didn't know what to say, she momentarily stops cleaning up the snack packets and empty bottles on their floor to sit next to her friend she needs to be careful with how she was going to phrase her answer. The last thing they need right now is Yuqi circling back to not wanting to move again._

_Minnie takes a peek at Shuhua's desk again, the picture frame coming in her gaze, she constructs what she wanted to say to the younger girl, "Maybe you just met each other at the wrong time," Minnie starts. It's true, what they say, sometimes the right one comes at the wrong time. Though Minnie isn't one to shy away from the cliché things in life, it has gotten to the point that it was so real that Minnie herself believed it as well._

_"The right love and the right time will come to you if it is really meant to be."_

_Yuqi smiles a little, the first of the genuine smiles that Minnie missed seeing on the younger one's face. "I wish I could be like you and Soojin unnie."_

_Minnie smiles at the mention of the name._

_Soojin._

_She glances back at the picture frame on Shuhua's desk, spotting the keen smile on Soojin's face as she poses along with her trio._

_For a little moment she forgets she was talking to Yuqi, thinking about the chips Soojin asked her to buy on her way back to her dorm outside the campus. Minnie has been spending a lot of her time at Soojin's place, now that her former roommate had... disappeared? She's not even sure if that's the right word._

_Minnie smiles at Yuqi, somehow relieved and happy to see the younger girl calm after a few rounds of drinks and sniffles. Before she could say a word, the piercing silence of the night was disrupted by soft knocks on the door._

_Could that be Shuhua? Minnie wonders. Typically on their "drinking nights", Shuhua leaves to stay with her other friends in order to not cause a distraction for Minnie and Yuqi's bonding. However, it was almost five in the morning... could she have forgotten something? Was it an emergency? If that really was Shuhua, she would've had a key and just walked in anyway, why was she not walking in? Minnie's mind of questions wouldn't let her rest so she made a move to stand up from Yuqi's bed to approach the hesitant knock on the door._

_Minnie turns the knob and feels the click of the unlocking door before she slightly pulls it open._

_— Present_

_Knock. Knock. Knock._

Minnie tears her eyes away from the rain pelting on the windows of her bedroom, switching her view from the outside towards her bedroom door. Faint knocks broke through the non-stop pitter-patter of the rain on the roof of the house. A few seconds later, the door opened by itself, shining a streak of warm light into the bedroom that had gotten dark as time passed. Behind the door was Soyeon, shyly stepping inside before closing the door as soon as she got in.

Soyeon was hesitant to turn the lights on, Minnie might not want them on, that would make things worse, so she just decided to rely on whatever night vision was gifted to her as she slowly made her way to Minnie on the other side of the room. She could feel Minnie's eyes on her, even in the darkness, Soyeon could see her eyes glimmer from the tears she had shed not even an hour or so ago, she guesses.

She walks over to sit on the edge of Minnie's bed, not without awkwardly standing in front of Minnie first, her decision for actions buffering in her brain correlating to real time hesitant shuffles to which direction she should face. She ended up sitting on the edge of the bed, not making eye contact whatsoever, finding cracks on the walls more entertaining than her friend. Soyeon didn't know what to do, if she was being honest. She's always had this feeling that Minnie never liked her for Yuqi, but even if the time they spent together proved that otherwise, it's like a bug sitting at the back of her mind all the time that comes out and bites her whenever Minnie and her are left alone. She assumes they grew apart after what she had done to Yuqi when they were in college, but not too far away from each other that they stopped treating each other as friends. They were both with Yuqi, what were they supposed to do?

Soyeon finds it in the very far pits of her stomach, the courage to start a topic with Minnie after all these months of pain and suffering. She takes a deep breath before lifting her head up to look at Minnie who was sitting beside her, still as a statue.

"Minnie unnie," Soyeon starts, hoping to catch the girl's attention.

"Uh... I'm lost."

The phrase piqued Minnie for a moment, it wasn't something she expected to hear. She was looking forward to an " _Are you okay?_ " or a " _Do you need some water?_ " but definitely not " _I'm lost._ "

"I, I think that we've drifted apart over past few months, years even. I haven't talked to you that much, and I know that besides work and all the things that happened in life, I feel like we struck a cord a long time ago and we never really got to talk and fix it at all." Once Soyeon started talking, it was like someone turned a faucet of words, her feelings flew out like gushes of water from a pipe and she doesn't intend to stop.

"We've stayed civil, we've stayed friends, we've helped each other over the past few years, still, right?" It was rhetorical, Soyeon was fully aware of the fact that she was not getting a reply from Minnie but she didn't care, she wanted to talk to her unnie again for the longest time.

"I think I didn't just lose myself when I lost Yuqi back then, I feel like I lost you as well and it's like you never came back." It was worded out to be painstaking, but Soyeon was saying it as if she was reading off of a story book rather than expressing her own thoughts. Minnie kept silent.

"I know things have been tough, real tough. And even if Yuqi and I are doing well, I still feel like I'm lost." Minnie shifted in her seat which frightened Soyeon. For a minute there, Soyeon actually thought she was alone and the sudden movement made her jerk back a little, earning herself a little awkward laugh.

The atmosphere was starting to get lighter as soon as Soyeon felt more comfortable to talk, Minnie didn't seem to mind, but Soyeon can't read what's going on in her head just yet. Safe to say she was going with the flow along with her spout of words. "Back then, I guess I never told you how much you meant to me."

Soyeon smiles weakly, sending it to Minnie's way before retreating her eyes to her hands that have grown sweaty. "I've never had an unnie before, I was always used to doing things on my own and not having anyone to rely on but myself, but when you and Yuqi came along, I just felt like a whole other part of me got to be alive." She thinks back to all the times she went back to their dorm drunk and Minnie had to take care of her, all the times she was frustrated and Minnie would offer her some tea or some chocolate, all the times she would silently cry and Minnie would walk over to give her a hug and hand her some water. Okay, now she thinks she's going to cry.

"Unnie," Soyeon lifts her head up to talk to Minnie eye-to-eye, "You've helped me a lot back then, and I never got to thank you for any of it. I felt like I caused you more harm than good, but you were still there for me."

Soyeon didn't know what came over her but she inched forward, taking Minnie's cold hands in her own, "I'm lost, I still am, but I'm used to it and I've always found my way back."

She squeezes Minnie's palms a little bit, still not a single word from the other girl, "Now, you're the one who's lost."

Minnie's eyes pan down to their hands, seeing how much she's grown pale in comparison to her friend. Her hands are still bigger than Soyeon's, but they looked weaker, ready to crumble at any second. But the warmth that Soyeon has brought to her palms brought a few patches of color back into them.

"I want to help you find your way back, like you've always held a light for me with your arms out to welcome me home."

Minnie looks up to find Soyeon with a tear streaming down her cheek, smiling a bit to show she's not sad, but rather she was hopeful.

It hasn't clicked into Minnie's mind yet, the months Yuqi spent to stay with her, the time they took to take care of her, it wasn't out of pity.

She feels guilt build at the pits of her stomach. She was losing hope after all, but hearing Soyeon open up to her as if they were back in their shared dorm during their college years, it felt like Minnie went back in time, feeling more like herself than she ever did in the past few months. It was rejuvenating.

Something in Minnie's mind is telling her to ignore the feelings, ignore how warm her heart has gotten, ignore the smile threatening to show, ignore the tears that wanted to flow. It was that crippling voice that came with the crawling goosebumps on her back. It was only going to get worse if she doesn't do anything about it, Minnie knew that for a fact, it almost got ahead of her earlier when she was in the bathroom. Seeing how much her friends are willing to help her gave her a sense of hope she knew wasn't ever going to fail.

Suddenly, Minnie lunges forward to wrap Soyeon in a hug. The younger girl, clearly startled from the embrace, let out a small yelp with her eyes shut. A few seconds after realizing she wasn't in any sort of harm, Soyeon brought her own arms around Minnie, still surprised from the otherworldly feeling of her hug that she hasn't felt in a long time.

They stayed like that, tightly wrapping their arms around each other, listening to each other breathe. Soyeon giving Minnie back rubs from time-to-time, whispering, "It's okay. You'll be okay."

She wants to be okay, Minnie wants to be okay.

Yuqi wants her to be okay, Soyeon wants her to be okay.

...

Soojin would want her to be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey there! it's been a while.
> 
> sorry for the unannounced hiatus. i wasn't aware i was gonna have one either lol. but i'm working to finish this book. took a lot of time for me to finally get back into writing, and over the past few months, this fic hasn't left my mind and i keep thinking about things to spice it up or make it better for you guys to enjoy!
> 
> i'm not going to promise anything, but one thing i will say is i will finish this fic because i've fallen in love with it and i want to share what's been brewing in my mind to all of you. idk when, idk how, but i will.
> 
> thank you for reading, thank you for waiting! i hope you enjoy the rest of it coming soon!
> 
> -c


	7. 7 - Reminiscence

" _What do you want, Song Yuqi?_ "

Yuqi sits outside on Minnie's balcony, rain hitting the tips of her toes as she holds her phone up to her ear.

Her talk with Soyeon earlier had motivated her. It just takes a little more patience and a lot of perseverance if she wants to make things better. She felt herself break a few minutes ago, and if it weren't for the impactful words of her girlfriend, she might have given up already.

"Yeh Shuhua-ya, aren't you happy to hear my lovely voice? Don't you miss me?" Yuqi jokes, trying to ignore the fast-paced beats of her heart. She could already imagine the girl on the other side of the line rolling her eyes to the back of her head.

She missed this. She missed the teasing and the playfulness they used to share. Though the years have passed and their connection has been quite terrible lately, it always felt so homey to talk to Shuhua, even if they annoy each other. Yuqi wonders if this will go smoothly or end horribly.

 _"If you're just gonna call to pester me with your silly jokes then I suggest you hang up."_ Shuhua sounded stern, but it made Yuqi want to tease her more.

"Aw, no _you_ hang up!" Yuqi says in a voice coated with honey, she follows it with an exaggerated giggle as she waits for the other girl to reply. Yuqi teases her with one of those snobby high school boyfriend girlfriend calls she isn't going to deny she made herself. She might have been taking it too far but nothings beats a good laugh to shake away the nerves.

" _Okay."_ Shuhua quickly responds and the next thing Yuqi knows, she hears the end tone of a call.

Yuqi pulls her phone down from her ear to see that Shuhua _did_ hang up on her. She laughs to herself, she must have caught Shuhua in a bad time.

This girl is never going to take her seriously if she keeps joking around, but Yuqi was just playing with her to set a mood. They used to be roommates after all, by this time, Shuhua should be used to the playful charm that Yuqi possessed.

Yuqi dials the number again and puts her phone up to her ear, hearing seven rings before she's greeted with an annoyed tone once more, " _Are you going to do this all day?"_

Yuqi laughs at the clearly annoyed Shuhua on the other line, "What's up with you, why do you sound like you want to kill me?" Yuqi couldn't hold herself from laughing at how much she must be getting on the girls's nerves, for all she knows she might be disturbing something.

_"I really do want to kill you. Now, enough with the jokes. What is it?"_

And only now does Yuqi think. She was so caught up with trying to rid herself of her nervousness that she forgot what she was going to say.

Will she just tell the truth, tell Shuhua that they're trying to help Minnie again?

Soyeon's words from their lunch talk came back to her. Does Shuhua really want to just forget the whole thing ever happened to the point she'd want to forget about Minnie as well? Shuhua has been all too vague right now for Yuqi to guess anything. What Soyeon said earlier did make sense, but what if Soyeon was wrong?

Yuqi shakes her head, Soyeon is never wrong when she feels something.

 _"Did you pass out or something? Hello?"_ Shuhua's voice snapped Yuqi out of the questions in her head.

Soyeon may be right, right about the fact that if Shuhua hasn't even reached out, it may mean she's still mad. Either the youngest still buried some anger for Minnie, or she just wanted to forget and move on. Yuqi is sitting on the edge here, she has to be careful.

A little vagueness won't hurt.

 _"_ Soyeon's birthday is coming up, we wanted to celebrate a little for her twenty-seventh year on this planet and also getting the new place. We were hoping you'd be able to come!" Yuqi purses her lips and closes her eyes after straight up saying a lie, which was smooth if you would ask her. She asked for vagueness, not lying to her two friends in a row. Yuqi rests her palm on her forehead, pleading for the younger girl to believe her. She just wants to make everything better.

As she waits for the girl on the other line to respond, she could hear her heart beat faster and faster. It was thumping out of her chest as the seconds passed by.

"Uh, also, if you could bring a friend or someone along, that would be great!" She remembered at the last second that this had to be a 'gathering' and a gathering means there should be people. Recalling a few friends that Shuhua had introduced to her when they were still studying, this would be a good chance for Shuhua to agree.

 _"I wouldn't want to be stuck with you the entire time."_ Shuhua retorts and Yuqi laughs. Ah, she returns the playfulness, it fills Yuqi's heart.

"So will you go?" Yuqi bounces her knees up and down, nervously waiting for Shuhua's answer. She could pull this off.

The other girl kept taking her time to respond and it was making Yuqi feel like she's going to spontaneously combust. Please go, please go.

" _Yeah, sure. I haven't seen Soyeon in a long time. When is it? Tuesday, right?"_ Shuhua takes a pause before confirming the day and Yuqi quietly celebrates at the girl's response before answering her question, she mocks a scream as she opened her mouth but not a sound came out, "Yep! Tuesday at seven."

" _I'll go ask my friends if they want to go, who can deny free food?"_ Shuhua was starting to lighten up and a wave of relief washes over Yuqi.

"That's great to hear, Shuhua-ya! And no need to bring anything, Soyeon's a big girl, she doesn't need toys or what." Yuqi continues to play with the conversation. She didn't think it would be this easy to ask Shuhua along, she was nervous for nothing.

" _No, that is very impolite. I'll go get her some food or some clothes, you can't tell me what to do."_ Ah, it's nice to hear that things have not changed with Shuhua. Yuqi laughs at the girl's tone, she can't help but keep their conversation going since it was o hard to get a hold of Shuhua.

"It's your money anyway, I won't stop you," Yuqi giggles, "How are things going with masters? Are you dying or sailing?" Yuqi crosses her legs, making herself comfortable while she engages with small talk.

" _Things have been decent, I guess. It's not as hard as I thought it would be_ ," Yuqi hears shuffling on the other side of the line, Shuhua must be resting on her bed when Yuqi called, " _Of course there are a couple of hiccups here and there, but it's better than having such a monotonous year."_

Shuhua's korean has improved massively since they were roommates in college, Yuqi still isn't used to it. Then again, Shuhua has always been the more studious one between the two of them, hence Shuhua still studying right now. It makes Yuqi proud.

"I'm glad to hear you're doing well, it's not everyday I don't get to hear you whining and screaming." Yuqi goes back to teasing, which is awfully normal and Shuhua always receives the end of the stick for it, " _Ya! That was years ago, get over it already_."

They share a few more laughs and stories, Yuqi telling her about Haku and Mata and how the pups have been doing at their place. The dogs have been with Soyeon and Yuqi for a while now but that doesn't stop Shuhua from giving Yuqi an endless list of things that the puppies loved.

" _They need a ball for the outside and a ball for the inside. You cannot let them play with the same ball from the park. They should have a long leash and a short leash, you sometimes have to let them wander when you walk them, they need to get that freedom. And do not get me started on their diet."_ Yuqi just agrees and laughs at every new rule Shuhua has imposed for the dogs. It just shows how much Shuhua loves them.

They start to get into topics about relationships and how Shuhua wants to gag at everything cheesy Yuqi told her.

"Have you been seeing anyone lately?" Yuqi raises a juicy question, to which Shuhua scoffs, " _Did you really think I would get myself into something so stressful while taking masters?"_

Yuqi brings herself to chuckle at the girl, ever so picky and prudent.

"That didn't seem like the situation you were in back in college." As Yuqi brings up the past, she could hear Shuhua whine from the depicted cringe of the memories that flooded back to both of their minds.

" _You know, I've only been hooked on one person that much and I still didn't let it phase me,"_ Yuqi was silently laughing at the blatant lie Shuhua just spouted, " _Stop it. I can hear you snickering."_

It was a good catching-up session over the phone, even if Yuqi's butt started to hurt from sitting on the tiles for too long. The rain didn't stop pouring, but has calmed down quite a bit from earlier. They would've continued to talk the day away but Shuhua had to excuse herself for some errands she needed to do.

" _I'll be there at 7 on Tuesday, don't embarrass me please."_

They exchanged short goodbyes, Yuqi wanted to tease her more but she knew how busy the younger girl could get.

Yuqi was smiling, the talk she just had with Shuhua brought her energy levels up again. She wasn't feeling terrible anymore, better than earlier by a lot. She got up from where she was seated and went inside the house. Patting down her shoes on a rug they had placed, she goes off to look for a towel they had brought to dry her legs from the rainwater.

After finding it in her bag and patting herself dry, Soyeon made herself down the staircase and spots Yuqi by the living room.

"Hey, how did it go, did you call Shuhua?" Soyeon approaches her girlfriend and sits on the couch in front of her.

"Yeah, I did. I was afraid I would just leave a voicemail but she actually picked up."

"Well, is she going?" Soyeon sounded scared for a moment there, nervous of the answer Yuqi was about to tell her.

"Yeah, she is!" Yuqi shouted and jumped but Soyeon had to shush her down, totally reminding Yuqi of why they were holding the birthday party in the first place.

"I mean, _yeah, she is!"_ Yuqi whisper screamed, approaching her girlfriend on the couch. She sat next to Soyeon and quickly found the shorter girl's hand. They intertwined their hands together and both sighed in relief. Everything was going according to plan.

"Now what?" Soyeon asked, properly highlighting the feeling they both have at the moment.

Yuqi shrugs, which technically shouldn't be the answer to the question since she was the one who came up with the plan in the first place.

"I don't know yet, but you have to trust me on this." They both stare at the ceiling, the silence not bothering them at all from all the things that are circulating in their heads.

"How's Minnie unnie doing? Is she okay?" Yuqi asks, she was suddenly reminded of the well-being of their friend.

"She fell asleep just now," Soyeon stated, "She finally talked to me."

Yuqi sits up and looks at her girlfriend with excitement, "You're kidding me, what did she say?"

Soyeon laughs at how Yuqi's ears perked when she mentioned the tiny conversation she had with Minnie before the older girl fell asleep, "She told me she was sorry and she was thankful to have us as her friends."

Yuqi seemed to be satisfied with Soyeon's paraphrased answer because she squeals out of joy before burying Soyeon in a tight hug, "Yuqi-ya, I can't breathe."

Yuqi can't contain her happiness, she was so happy with how things are playing out. She was not getting deceived by false hope of Minnie ever coming back to them. She was excited for what's to come in the future with the person she missed so much. All of her hard work was finally bearing fruit and she can't help but get emotional at the outcome of it at the moment.

"A-are you crying?" Poor Soyeon, squished in a hug, questioning the state of her girlfriend who was laughing a second earlier, now a heaving mess.

Yuqi didn't answer, she just continued to bawl out of joy. Soyeon wasn't one to press on, she completely understood how overwhelmed Yuqi was feeling and decided to be the comforting back-rubber once a again to both of the people she loved and cared for.

It was all coming together, finally.

—

Minnie didn't wake up for dinner that night, nor the breakfast the day after.

It seemed like she hadn't had this much rest in a few weeks. Her friends wanted her to get as much rest as possible before they had to go. The overnight stay wasn't in their plan, but after all that happened, they figured they needed to be somewhere near the friend they love.

Their work, however, was hard to not think about.

"Maybe I can still call in sick?" Yuqi tried to persuade her girlfriend one more time before the last of their things were in their bags.

"Yuqi, we talked about this." Soyeon wasn't at her wit's end just yet. She understood why Yuqi wanted to stay. Soyeon wants to do the same herself. But in order for them to set things straight, they need to prepare for the day after today.

"We already clocked our leaves for tomorrow, telling everyone we'd be going somewhere _private_ to spend my birthday. We can't not show up at work two days in a row." Soyeon's voice was pretty clear and all Yuqi did was pout. Yuqi doesn't have a way out of this.

Before the couple left, they visited Minnie's room to see if she was awake.

Yuqi knocked softly on the door before calling out, "Minnie unnie, are you awake?"

After ten whole seconds of silence, Soyeon did not want them to disturb Minnie with the first genuine sleep she's had in weeks, but Yuqi wasn't leaving without making sure Minnie will be okay.

"Minnie unnie?" Yuqi was starting to get worried.

She already has her had on the doorknob, ready to open as soon as she gets the permission to do so.

Yuqi called put one last time, "Minnie unnie, are you awake?"

"Let's just let her sleep, okay?" Soyeon pats her girlfriend's back in order to reassure her. "I left a note downstairs with some lunch, I hope she sees it."

Yuqi didn't want to go without seeing Minnie. She hadn't slept a wink after everything that just happened, she didn't want to leave Minnie's side ever again. But, duty calls. She waited, and waited, and waited for her to get this job. She can't afford to mess it up.

With one last look at the door, Yuqi went down the stairs to her girlfriend. Looking around the living room that was spotless, hard to believe it was covered in dirt and trash just the day before.

Soyeon was already outside, getting her motorcycle ready for them to leave on.

Before Yuqi went out the door, a hand grabbed her wrist and she screamed the loudest she's ever screamed. After that jump in her heart, she was able to look back at who the hand belonged to, it was Minnie.

"Ah, Minnie unnie, don't scare me like that." Yuqi stomps her feet while facing the girl completely. Minnie didn't say anything, but a small smile formed on her lips and it made Yuqi want to cry.

"We need to go to work, unnie, but I'll be here to pick you up for tomorrow, okay?" Yuqi held Minnie's hands in her own, happy to see a smile on her face again. Minnie nods, "Alright. Be safe, you two." Minnie looks to Yuqi's side and Yuqi follows, Soyeon was standing beside them and was smiling as well. Yuqi wanted to cry even more.

Minnie offered her arms out for the three of them to hug, Yuqi couldn't keep it in anymore. The next thing they knew, Minnie and Soyeon were trying to pull Yuqi off of Minnie because the couple were already late for their respective jobs.

After finally getting Yuqi off of Minnie and on the motorcycle, the couple speed away. Yuqi was trying to turn around to wave at Minnie, and Minnie was waving on her own by the gate of her house.

She's lucky she has those two. She didn't think they'd stay all these months with her. She was lucky she was loved and cared about. That made her smile.

Now, off to a little meal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and we're moving forward!
> 
> thank you for still reading even if this goes as slow as possible. It is so slow that you guys haven't even met the other part of the pair this book was supposed to have. I just really wanted to establish some kind of support for their backstory early on, it's kinda hard to make sense of these things if you didn't know why and how they happened. However, a lot of it is still buried in the sand, I'm sure you'll get to read more about them soon in future chapters.
> 
> Thank you again for reading! Happy holidays!
> 
> -c
> 
> also i have no idea how to fix the spacing in the paragraphs. my phone is wonky lol and i don't really wanna do this on pc so thank u for your understanding <3


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